


The Great Shiba in You

by Nouvamin



Series: The Great Shiba in You [1]
Category: Thai Actor RPF, เกลียดนักมาเป็นที่รักกันซะดีๆ | TharnType: The Series (TV), เกลียดนักมาเป็นที่รักกันซะดีๆ | TharnType: The Series (TV) RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Bullying, Dogs, First Time, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Romance, SHIBA INU, TOXIC SOLO STAN
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-19
Updated: 2021-02-12
Packaged: 2021-03-17 23:09:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 21,256
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28857132
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nouvamin/pseuds/Nouvamin
Summary: A great man, a shiba inu and a near wilted sunflower.What has gone wrong can always be made right and mistakes are there to serve as lessons for us all.A broken heart can be pieced back together and walls torn down can be rebuilt and transformed.This is my therapy GreatGulf fic.Enjoy.
Relationships: Great Sapol Assawamunkong/Gulf Kanawut Traipipattanapong, Great/Gulf, GreatGulf
Series: The Great Shiba in You [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2159742
Comments: 55
Kudos: 76





	1. Completely and Utterly Smitten

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by a good boi  
> https://www.instagram.com/p/CJ77Zr_FzuF/?igshid=4jcxjjpxjvfs
> 
> Dedicated to a royally good boy (not Jiro). Thank you for the good times.
> 
> Also for the rest of my Phiballs.

The Shiba had been staring at him since he sat down on the bench beside the foodcart, it’s beady eyes never leaving the meat skewer he was chewing on. Copious drool fell from it’s tongue as it stood unmoving a distance away, as if it was too shy to approach but too fixated on his food to leave. 

The dog looked hungry, but Gulf rarely interacted with them so he wasn’t sure what to make of the situation. Should he feed it? Were dogs allergic to skewers? The shiny coat and rounded belly suggested that it probably had an owner so he definitely shouldn’t risk poisoning it.

But those eyes. Those puppy eyes.

Gulf always had a weakness for animals, even ones that were spoiled, haughty and vicious, like a certain furball that someone he knew owned. Someone who had just in a matter of a few days crushed his already fragile heart. He once thought being shouted at was bad, but being ignored was worse. Not knowing what the other party was thinking did awful things to his headspace and as much as he tried to maintain a sense of normalcy, Gulf knew he was crumbling fast. 

As if sensing his sudden onset of melancholy, the shy dog slowly trotted towards him and lightly nuzzled it’s snout against his shin. It was no longer drooling and stood just gazing at him curiously. 

“Hello,” he said, reaching out to lightly pat the dog’s head.

Dark eyes stared back. 

“Why are you alone?” he asked. “Are you hungry? Do you want this?” Gulf held up the last skewer he had and the dog’s eyes immediately trained on it. _Perhaps a little wouldn’t hurt. It’s just one skewer._ “Here, you can have it,” he said, pushing the meat off the stick and onto his palm. Then, he held it in front of the Shiba. It sniffed cautiously at the saucey contents before swiping the entire thing off with one big slurp of it’s tongue. 

Gulf laughed. It was so cute. 

The dog let out a small bark of appreciation, panting happily at him. Gulf laughed even louder.

“Jiro!” a lady’s voice called out.

Gulf looked up and saw a lady wearing an apron running out of the store behind. 

“Jiro! Why did you run out again!?” the lady said before she noticed his presence. “Oh, hello there! Sorry about that. He’s not disturbing you right?”

“Ah, no!” Gulf waved his hands. “He’s very polite,” he said, smiling.

“Yes, he is,” the lady smiled. “Jiro is usually shy around strangers so I’m surprised he approached you.”

“I think he was hungry,” he said.

“He just had lunch! And a big one too!” the lady exclaimed, before patting Jiro’s head. “Such a greedy boy.”

Gulf laughed. “Is he yours?” he asked.

“Oh no! I worked for a dog daycare centre. Jiro’s owner left him here while he’s gone out to run some errands.” 

“I see.”

Jiro’s owner must be nice. Pets’ personalities were a reflection of their owners he’d learnt. 

“Anyway I have to go, I need to take care of the other dogs. I’ll see you around…. N’Gulf.” the lady said. 

He instinctively backed away from the lady. 

“Don’t worry! I’m not a crazy fan! I mean- I’ve just seen you around that’s all… on TV and ads.” she said smiling sheepishly before hooking a leash onto Jiro’s collar. “Anyway, I’ll be off!” 

Gulf watched as the lady hurried back into the store while pulling Jiro along, whose head kept turning back to him and it’s puppy eyes seemingly begging for rescue.

He snorted. What a strange and curious dog. 

Throwing the wooden sticks into the bin, Gulf thanked the food cart owner and got off the bench, heading towards the street leading back to his house. He felt slightly better than he did earlier in the morning, which was spent staring at his phone and being disheartened by the absence of one notification he wanted to see.

Maybe he could come back in a few days. 

Playing with dogs was just as fun as playing with cats.

* * *

Gulf came back the next day. 

His Mae had raised her eyebrows at him when he stepped out of the door, asking why he didn’t spend his precious time off at home instead. Gulf didn’t have the heart to tell her staying home meant he would be left alone with his thoughts and he didn’t want any of that. Spending the past few days ruminating was enough. He wanted fresh air, and needed the bustling streets of bangkok to drown the noises in his head. 

However the corner street Gulf was at now was devoid of any traffic and he sat waiting at the same bench he did yesterday. _So much for white noise to distract you._ He hadn’t bought his favorite skewers yet, having decided to wait for Jiro to appear before doing so. The dog deserved piping hot meat for his good manners. 

Sensing movement from his side, he whipped his head around in excitement but was immediately disappointed at what he saw. A small ball of fur had approached the bench and was sniffing around. It was a pomeranian. The little thing slowly trotted closer as it examined the pavement, stopping just shy of his feet. 

“Hi,” he called out tentatively.

The pomeranian looked up and growled. 

“Well, you’re not very friendly aren’t you?” he commented.

“Alexander!!” A woman’s voice sounded his side.

Gulf couldn’t believe what he just heard. Of all the names the woman could have chosen, it had to be the one that he absolutely did not want to hear right now. That _person_ loved that name.

A petite and plump lady appeared beside him and picked the small dog up. “Alexander, why did you run away on your own! You need to be careful of strangers!”

The little pet growled at him again and barked incessantly. Gulf was glad he had his mask on this time, he didn’t want anyone to recognize him, especially someone who owned a pomeranian and named it _Alexander_. _Talk about coincidence,_ he mulled.

“He’s quite feisty huh,” Gulf said, unable to help himself.

The woman narrowed her eyes at him. “Are you insulting my dog?” she asked.

“Oh no!” he replied. “I just meant he’s quite energetic.” 

The woman squinted at him before her eyes suddenly lit up. “Come now, Alexander,” she said to the furball in her arms. “We shouldn’t hang around leeches.” 

“What did you say?” Gulf asked. He couldn’t believe his ears. The woman just called him a _leech_. Did she by any chance recognize him?

“Did you hear anything?” the woman said to her dog while walking off. “We really shouldn’t listen to leeches. They are good for nothing anyway.”

Gulf gritted his teeth. Normally he wouldn’t be affected since these things never bother him much. Heck, he had read hundreds of hate tweets and slept them off just fine. But it was different this time. The hate was real and out in the open right in front of him. Worse still, there was nothing he could do other than to stay silent.

Stay a mute.

Gulf knew he wasn’t like the woman said. He worked hard to get to where he was and by no means did he ever consider riding on the coattails of someone else’s success. There was contribution on his part, he was sure of it, and others around him knew.

Why then did her words still hurt?

His eyes burned and the cloth mask covering his cheeks became damp. He was crying again, and in broad daylight while in full view of the public. 

How pathetic.

Just then, a soft whine sounded from beside him. 

It was Jiro.

He turned to the dog and patted it’s head. “Hey Jiro, you finally managed to escape again.” he said. 

Jiro whined louder and nudged at his hand.

“I’m okay, Jiro,” he said while wiping the wetness from his eyes. “Just met someone nasty that’s all. I’ll be fine.”

Jiro started licking his wrist and it tickled, drawing giggles out of him. 

“Stop it, Jiro!” he laughed, petting the dog again before getting up. “Let’s get some skewers to share, shall we?” 

Gulf bought double the portion of skewers he normally did and offered more than half of them to Jiro. He knew it wasn’t healthy for a dog to have so much, but looking at how happily Jiro was slurping at his palm, he couldn’t bring himself to stop.

Besides, he wasn’t sure when he could visit again. Work was starting to pick up as the new year ushered in and he would soon be busy with shoots and other activities.

“Jiro, this has to be a secret between you and me, okay?” Gulf said when Jiro finished the last of his skewers. “Don’t tell your owner I’ve been spoiling you,” he said, searching the spot just behind Jiro’s ear. 

The lady from the daycare centre, or rather Peach, as he learnt later called out soon after and they exchanged pleasantries before he shooed the dog back into the shop. Jiro was once again reluctant to leave his side and Gulf jokingly asked if the dog had issues with it’s owner.

“Ah no, his owner usually only drops Jiro off once or twice a week, but recently he’s been busy with work, so I think Jiro misses him. I heard he’s in the entertainment industry too so you might know him.” Peach said.

Gulf was immediately intrigued. “Really?” he asked. “Do you know his name?” 

“Unfortunately no, he’s quite private and he only goes by Mr. S.A.” 

“I see.”

That was the end of their conversation as Peach hurried back into the center and Gulf made his way back home.

He hoped to meet Mr S.A. one day.

* * *

Gulf visited the food cart nearly everyday for the rest of the week. No matter how busy he got, he always made sure to take the short walk around the corner behind his house to the food cart and waited patiently at the bench for Jiro to appear. Strangely, he never managed to bump into Jiro’s owner, who was more elusive than he thought. Not that he minded. Jiro’s company was enough anyway. 

He always thought he was a cat person, but Jiro proved him wrong and he found himself liking the dog just as much as he liked cats, maybe even more. Perhaps it was because Jiro sometimes behaved like a cat - aloof and detached. Many passersby would try to pet it’s head but the Shiba would always duck away or hide behind the bench. Gulf hadn’t a single clue on what he did to garner such affection from the prideful dog but he was glad it happened anyway. The numerous short interactions between them had begun to slowly fill the aching void in his chest and he no longer felt the need to check his phone 24/7. 

Maybe he was really learning to let go.

And maybe Mild was right about time healing.

Gulf sipped from his cup of iced lemongrass drink while he watched the late afternoon traffic. Jiro was already back at the daycare centre but he chose to hang around after since the weather was overcast and windy today. 

It was his favorite. 

He used to like the sun but lately he found himself heading out more when the orange globe was hidden. That way he didn’t have to feel the heat of its rays and the burn of its light on his skin, which reminded him too much of promises broken. 

A soft bark sounded from beside him and he lazily glanced over. 

It was the dastardly Pomeranian again with it’s dreadful owner trailing behind a distance away.

“Alexander!” the plump lady called out. “Why are you here again?! I already told you to stay away!”

Gulf looked on curiously. He hadn’t seen the duo in almost a week and was convinced their previous encounter was a one-time thing. Turns out he’d been wrong, like he’d been wrong about every other thing in the past 2 years.

“Good afternoon,” he blurted out. _Stop trying to be polite, Gulf._

The woman eyed him again before bending down to pick the small dog up. But the little ball of fur was quick and dashed forward towards him instead. Gulf initially thought it was trying to escape but then it head-butted his shin and latched it’s small jaw onto his jeans, hard.

“Shia!” he cursed, and his drink fell from his hand and landed on the ground in a splash. Gulf tried shaking the pomeranian off but the little thing hung on tight and refused to budge, growling and baring it’s teeth at him.

“Alexander!” The woman ran over but did not make any move to detach her dog from his poor leg. 

“Get your dog off me!” he shouted at the woman while trying to pull the pomeranian off and was almost bitten. 

“Alexander is just being friendly,” the lady smirked.

“How is this friendly!?” he yelled. “It’s biting me!”

The woman shrugged.

“Shia!” he cursed again when sudden pain flared up from his shin. The bite must have broken through his jeans. “Can’t you do anything?!”

Just then he heard a loud bark from behind him and a blurry shade of orange flashed past his side. 

Jiro slammed it’s body into the pomeranian with precision Gulf never knew dogs had and the small dog flew nearly a metre away from him, landing in a heap while it’s owner let out a high pitched shriek.

“Alexander!” The woman ran over to her dog in panic. “Are you alright?”

Jiro growled at the woman while Gulf stared dumbfounded at the scene in front of him.

Did Jiro just body-slammed a small dog nearly a fifth of it’s size?

Gulf turned to his panting canine rescuer. “I appreciate the help Jiro, but couldn’t you have tried something less... violent?” he said.

Jiro barked back at him, it’s snout pointed up in obvious defiance and Gulf let out a sigh. “What am I going to do with you?”

“You will pay for this!! You and your stupid dog!” the woman screamed at him and Jiro. “Alexander is hurt!”

“Look, it’s not my dog and yours was attacking me so-”

“No wonder he’s ignoring you!” The woman pointed a finger at him. “You always let others do your dirty work and cover up for you because you are good-for-nothing!”

Gulf was stumped by the woman’s words. 

What was the world coming to? Has everyone gone crazy? Who would insult another person so blatantly in the open? He didn’t know the woman before this week. Why did she have so much hate for him? 

Was it all because of _him_? 

Gulf was done. He was done mulling, done nursing his broken heart and done trying to repair bridges he didn’t burn. 

Just done. 

“You’re wrong,” he said calmly. “I’m not like that. Everything I’ve achieved so far has also been a result of my hard work.” 

The woman glared at him. “Yeah right. As if people would believe you. I don’t-”

“I believe him.” 

Gulf knew the owner of the voice. 

“What-?” the woman looked confused. “Who are you?”

“Owner of the dog which you just called stupid.” 

It was Great.

His Phi from the Boyfriend project stood just a few steps away from him with sunglasses and a cap on. In his hand was a cup of ice coffee and he sipped casually at it while watching them.

“P’Great?” he called out shyly.

“Hello, N’Gulf.” Great gave him a little wave of his hand.

“Your dog just injured mine!” the woman hollered.

“So?” Great said, “Jiro was just helping someone in need and I saw the whole thing happen from afar. You allowed your dog to attack N’Gulf.” 

“Alexander was just being friendly!!”

“He’s bleeding.” Great pointed to his leg.

Gulf looked down and saw that his jeans were torn with dark ruby stains on them.

He was really bleeding.

“Shia,” he cursed, reaching down to check his wound site. Now that he realized he was bleeding, it also meant that he realized he was hurting too and it did, a lot.

“You should apologize to him and pay for his medical expenses,” Great continued. “He’s hurt because of your dog.”

“That’s because he provoked Alexander! It’s not my fault! And I’m not staying here anymore listening to your accusations!.” The woman picked up her pomeranian which was already up on it’s paws and scurried off into the streets. 

Great snorted. “What a coward. Running away when she knows she can’t win. Should I give chase, N’Gulf?”

Gulf regarded the tall man for a moment. “It’s okay, P’Great. I don’t really want to deal with her anymore.” he said tiredly. “Thank you for stepping in though.”

Great gave him a small smile and nodded.

Jiro whined softly beside him and kept pointing it’s snout at his wound. Gulf reached out and petted it’s head. “I’m okay, Jiro. Just a cut. Nothing to worry about.” he said.

“It’s not nothing.” Great appeared beside him, kneeling down to check on his wound. “You should get it washed at a clinic, dog mouths contain many foreign bacteria and there might be a chance your wound would become infected.”

“I didn’t know that,” he said, initially planning to just head home and wash the wound like he would with a normal cut. “If that’s the case I’ll head to the clinic. There’s one down the street around the corner.” He pointed at a corner behind him. 

“I’ll go with you then. Come, I know which one you are referring to.” Great stood up and offered him a hand.

“Phi! You don’t have to!” he protested.

“N’Gulf, I want to help.” 

Gulf pointed to Jiro who was still sitting beside and waiting patiently. “What about Jiro?”

Great raised an eyebrow. “I'll leave him at the daycare. Wait here for me, okay?” he said, before turning to Jiro. “Come Jiro, let’s bring you back inside.” he gestured for Jiro to follow him. 

Jiro whined softly and kept nuzzling him. 

“Be a good boy, Jiro. I promise I’ll buy you more skewers next time.” he said, placing a peck on Jiro’s head before letting Great, who looked mildly amused at their exchange, pull the Shiba back into the daycare centre. 

Gulf let out a sigh while he waited. He didn’t like bothering other people and much preferred only asking for help from those he was close to. Great was a wonderful senior at work but he wasn’t familiar enough with him to accept his help. 

Especially now when he was still feeling… raw.

However, Gulf wasn’t one to reject other’s good intentions and he knew from their previous interactions, Great was just looking out for him - just like he did with other juniors in the boyfriend project. 

“Ah, good. You’re still here.” Great appeared by his side again. “I was afraid you might have run off.” 

Gulf looked up at Great’s grin. “Phi, do I look like someone that would do that?”

Great snorted. “Well, you were quite adamant about going by yourself.”

“If Phi insists, I won’t reject,” he said smiling and received a mock glare in return.

“Alright, let’s get you to the clinic. I don’t want to delay any longer.” Great said, holding out his hand for him to take.

Gulf held onto the offered arm and got off the bench. But the moment he did, pain shot up from his calf and he fell back onto the bench.

“N’Gulf? You okay?” Great asked, concerned.

“Phi, I don’t think I can stand. It hurts.” he grimaced.

“Aow.” Great let out. 

“Sorry,” he instinctively said.

“It’s okay. You don’t have to apologise.” Great said before turning his back towards him and squatting down.

“Alai na, Phi?”

“Get on,” Great said, “I’ll carry you to the clinic.”

Was the man serious? 

“P’Great!” Gulf said. “I don’t think this is a good idea! There are people watching!” 

“Put on your mask. I have mine on already. Also I’m wearing a cap and sunglasses. Nobody will recognize us.” Great said. 

“Phi…” 

“N’Gulf, you can’t walk and we need to get that wound checked out as soon as possible. Animal bites can get very serious.” 

Gulf looked around the street. There wasn’t a lot of traffic on the street so they might be able to pull this off without attracting too much attention. 

“Okay, Phi,” he relented and climbed into Great’s back, circling his arms around his neck. 

Great hooked his elbows underneath his knees and straightened, lifting him up effortlessly, as if Gulf weighed nothing. 

“You okay?” Great asked. 

“I’m okay, Phi,” he replied. “Thank you.”

Great started walking towards the clinic and Gulf kept his eyes trained on the ground ahead. As much as he hated to admit, being piggybacked felt rather nice. It reminded him of happier times, of his Pho and sister, of his childhood. Everyone loved giving him piggybacks, and he loved the attention.

Right now, with Great’s solid back holding him up and the slow steady bob of his strides, Gulf felt a faint stirring of something inside him. Something he hadn’t felt in a long while.

Comfort and safety. 

Things hadn’t been right since the middle of last year and he had tried his very best to repair whatever rifts that had appeared in his working relationship with _him_. Many said it was a futile effort because whenever he fixed something, a new problem would appear. 

But Gulf tried anyway. Even though it wasn’t a problem started by him, he tried his best to mediate, to fix, believing that if he had more faith in the situation, had more trust in _him_ , everything would be alright again. 

He was wrong, so wrong. 

Letting down his walls came at a price, left him vulnerable and open to hurt on levels he had never experienced before. He had taken a huge risk to trust and that trust was thrown into the wind, dispersed like sand blown away from an open palm. In the end all that was left, was an aching void in his heart. 

Gulf didn’t know when, or if he could ever trust again. 

“N’Gulf,” Great called out, his voice cutting through the melancholy in his head.

“Yes, Phi?” he answered.

“I meant what I said before.” Great said, his voice steady. “That I believe you. That you are hardworking and humble. It is not something commonly seen in our industry and I know fewer people than I can count with my fingers who are as down-to-earth, as determined... and as sweet as you are.” 

As Great’s words slowly sank in, the faint stirrings from before grew, filling the void inside him with tender warmth. It felt like a different sun had just shone upon him. One that didn’t burn with searing heat, that didn’t wilt away his confidence and self-worth but gave him strength through gentle streams of light so he could face life upright again.

Like a proud sunflower. 

“Thank you, Phi,” he said, voice nearly cracking. “I don’t know what else to say other than thank you. Thank you for helping me, for believing in me and… thank you for the kind words.” 

“I’m happy to say them, N’Gulf. You did so well for the Boyfriend concert, everyone was really taken in by your performance, even P’Kacha was full of praise and you know how picky he is. Also, I think Kao was completely smitten by the end of it.” Great laughed. 

Gulf could feel the familiar rush of heat towards his cheeks. Kao’s affection, or rather his ‘heart’ eyes for him, was a legendary joke amongst the boys in the project and they love to tease him about it. “Aow, Kao is usually smitten by everyone.” he said.

“Mostly by you,” Great said. 

“Phi…” Gulf lightly tapped at Great’s shoulders. 

Great laughed again. “Okay, okay, I’ll stop teasing you. Don’t strangle me please. We are still a few blocks away from the clinic.”

“What about Phi? Did you like my performance?” Gulf asked, eager to steer the conversation away from Kao.

“I was completely and utterly smitten by you.” 

Gulf was stumped again; stunned into silence. Was Great just teasing him or was he serious? He didn’t sound like he was making a joke and the way he said those words - wholeheartedly and sincerely made him think that perhaps, there was something more. “Phi…” he said. “I-”

“We are here,” Great said. 

He looked up and saw that they were standing in front of the clinic nearby his place. 

“Do you want me to carry you in?” Great asked.

“No!” he immediately replied. “I’ll get down here and hop myself in.”

Great let out a small laugh. “I thought so, that’s why I asked.” he said, before lowering himself and letting Gulf slowly slid off his back. 

“Thanks, Phi,” Gulf said as he landed on his good leg. 

Great wrapped his arm around his waist and helped him into the clinic. 

They didn’t have to wait long to see the doctor since it was near closing time. Gulf was given a shot of antibiotics and his wound was treated thoroughly by the nurse. Thankfully, the cut wasn’t deep and there shouldn’t be any visible scars left if he took proper care of it. Great sat quietly beside him the whole time and even held his hand when he winced during the jab. 

It felt nice to be taken care of. 

After picking up some medicine and salves, they left the clinic and Gulf found himself on Great’s back again. The man insisted on carrying him home after finding out his place was just nearby and he didn’t have the heart to reject him because Great apparently had something in common with Jiro. They both did puppy eyes really well. 

Too well, in fact. 

“Phi,” Gulf said.

“Yes, N’Gulf,” Great replied.

“Did you learn how to do puppy eyes from Jiro?” he asked.

Great stopped for a moment before continuing his strides. “Nope,” he said.

“Aow.”

“He learnt it from me.”

“...Aow, Phi. That’s…” Gulf was speechless.

Great let out a snort. “So you think I have puppy eyes?”

Gulf had a feeling that was a trick question. “...Yes.” he said.

“Hmm. N’Gulf must think I’m na rak, then.” 

“Aow, Phi!”

Great let out a loud, infectious laughter and Gulf couldn’t help but smile along. Whatever happened before was slowly beginning to fade from his mind and he was no longer feeling as down. Great seemed to have the same effect on him as Jiro did.

They arrived at his place after a few minutes and stopped just right outside the gates of his house. Gulf had insisted that he head in himself since technically he still had one good leg to hop on and he really did not want his Mae to see him on the backs of a guy. He was already vexed over how he was going to explain his wound. 

“Remember to take your medicine and to apply the salve,” Great reminded him as he let him down.

“I will, Phi,” he said, holding on to the grills of his gate. “Thank you again.”

“No problem, N’Gulf.” Great smiled. “By the way, when will you be free again?”

“Hmm… I think next friday.” he replied. “Why do you ask?” 

“I know you like Jiro very much. Peach has been telling me about you for the past week and how my dog seems to love you more than he loves me.” Great said. 

“Aow,” he let out.

Great grinned. “Since you are injured and will probably not be able to visit Jiro in the next few days, I thought of bringing him over when you’re free. My schedule is less tight for the next few weeks.” he said.

Gulf could feel tingling excitement in his gut. “Really?” he asked. “You would?”

“Of course. I’m completely and utterly smitten, remember?” 

He felt the tip of his ears heat up. “Okay then,” he said. “Friday sounds good.”

Great’s grin turned into a wide, beaming smile that nearly took his breath away. “Alright, I’ll text you. Take care, N’Gulf. And you should head back in soon, your Mae is waiting.” he said, pointing behind him before giving a wave. 

“See you, Phi,” he said.

Great smiled and waved one more time before turning around and leaving. 

Gulf watched his figure disappear down the street before limping and hopping onto his front porch. His Mae rushed out to help and he spent the next half an hour or so recounting the events of the day to her. She listened quietly as usual and gave him a hug after, telling him if he ever needed to talk, she would be there to listen. Hearing those words from his Mae nearly made him lose composure but he held steady, not wanting to worry her more than he did already. 

It was only when he was finally alone in his room that he allowed the tears to flow freely. Gulf sobbed quietly into his pillow and hugged himself into a ball. Even though Great’s appearance and words had temporarily lifted his mood, it didn’t erase the hurt left by the woman’s harsh words and now all he wanted to do was to sleep everything away so he didn’t need to feel anymore.

A ping sounded from his phone and he reluctantly took peek at it. 

It was a text from Great.

He quickly opened the message and was greeted with an image that nearly made him burst out laughing. It was a picture of Great himself holding a skewer with Jiro beside him looking away and sulking. 

_“I refused to feed him and now he hates me. What do I do, N’Gulf?”_ Great wrote as caption for the image.

 _“You should feed him then,”_ he replied.

_“Aow. Then he will grow fat.”_

_“He would become even more na-rak.”_

_“Does that mean if I’m fat, you will find me na-rak too? 55555”_

Gulf rolled his eyes. _“No.”_ He fired back a reply with an eye-roll emoji.

_“Aow. I’m hurt.”_

He snorted at his phone. _“You are not a dog.”_

_“But I’m still na-rak?”_

_“Maybe. Probably.”_ Gulf smiled as he typed.

_“Aow. Thanks. I feel better already.”_

_“You're welcome.”_

_“55555 Anyway, I have to go now. I’ll text you about friday soon. Take care of yourself, okay?”_

_“Okay, thank you Phi,”_ he replied.

Gulf put his phone away and turned onto his back, staring up at the ceiling. “Thank you, P’Great,” he whispered into the quiet of the room.

Just then, he realized something. In the midst of his conversation with Great, his tears had stopped completely and all it took, was a silly picture of a man and his dog. 

And with that, the flicker of hope inside him flared into a flame. There was going to be better days ahead, Gulf was sure.

He believed.


	2. Brick by Brick, I'll Rebuild for You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A visit, more vitriol and a tender promise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are a lot more going on in this chapter because I sort of let myself go. Enjoy.

Gulf wiped away the beads of sweat that were trickling down his face. The sun was blazing hot in the sky and he had taken to hiding under the large tree just outside his house. Great was late. After sending a text a while ago telling him that he was on his way to pick Jiro up, the man became unresponsive, which was odd considering how quick he usually was when replying to his texts and they texted _a lot_.

After that fateful day, Great would send him pictures of Jiro every morning and would always chat him up on his day when he responded, which he did every single time. Their conversations were full of random jokes and topics, but Gulf found himself enjoying them immensely because they took his mind off of _him_. So instead of mulling over failed almost-relationships, he started thinking more about his past interactions with Great and realized that ever since the Boyfriend project started, the man had never shied away from talking to him, offering help and encouraging him. 

It was heartening and startling, knowing that Great had somehow always been by his side, even more so than Kao or War, and he had never noticed, too caught up in his disappointment and yearning for a man who from the very beginning, did not truly care for him. However, no matter how flattering it was to know that someone wanted him, Gulf didn’t know if he was ready for anything yet. But it seemed like Great was willing to wait, just like he was waiting under the hot sun for him right now.

Only that Gulf was less patient. 

Squinting his eyes over the street again, Gulf tried spotting for any signs of a Shiba Inu and it’s owner but so far the only thing he could see was the forming mirage over the tarmac. It was _that_ hot. On any given day, no one would find him outside unless it was for a football match, but as much as he hated the heat now, it was not enough to deter him from welcoming his favorite pupper. And perhaps his owner. 

Perhaps. 

If he wasn’t late.

Gulf checked his phone again. His last message to Great still hadn’t been read and he was about to give him a call when he heard a loud bark from behind him.

It was Jiro!

Turning around, he saw the Shiba Inu racing down the street towards him and pulling it’s very amused and laughing owner along. “Jiro, slow down!” Great called out. “He’s not going anywhere!”

“Jiro!” Gulf shouted, waving enthusiastically at the pair.

The Shiba barked excitedly and leaped forward when it reached him, nearly crashing into his injured leg if it wasn’t for Great pulling his leash back in time. 

“Woah! Easy there, Jiro. N’Gulf is still injured.” Great said to Jiro, who was still trying to paw at him while wagging it’s tail. “Hello there, sorry I was late,” the man added on.

“Hello, Jiro!” Gulf bent down to pet the Shiba Inu before giving it a hug. “I miss you so, so, so much!” he said, squeezing the dog tightly. Gulf was more than elated to see his people-watching, skewer-sharing companion after nearly a week. “Have you been well, Jiro? Did you miss me too?” 

“Alai na!?” Great exclaimed. “First I don’t get a hello, now I’m being ignored while my dog receives a hug!?” 

“Aow, can’t you wait?” Gulf let out. “Besides, Jiro and I are having a _moment_.” he smiled into Jiro’s fur. Great wasn’t actually very late, maybe just over a quarter of an hour, but he was feeling petty and since he knew Jiro’s affection for him was a sore spot for the man, how better to rub it in than right in front of him?

Gulf heard a loud huff, followed by some indiscernible mutterings before he felt movement behind and two strong arms came up to wrap around him from the back. 

_Alai wa?_

“Erm Phi,” Gulf said. 

“Hm?” Great’s voice sounded over his shoulder. He was close, very close.

“What are you doing?” he asked.

“Having a _moment_ with you and Jiro.”

“Alai-”

“Shh…”

Gulf wanted to retort but Great pressing their bodies together was doing strange things to his mind. The warmth he was encased in felt hotter than the heat of the sun, but it didn’t feel smothering, not like it did before with _him_. In fact, it felt benign and just…warm, reminding him of that day when Great carried him on his back. “P’Great…” he said after what felt like forever. “When are you letting go?”

“That depends,” Great immediately replied.

“Aow,” he said, suddenly aware that the tip of his ears had heated up. Great’s back hug was indeed doing very strange things to him. “Depends on what?”

“Depends on whether or not you are done having your moment.”

“Oh.” Gulf said. “Then I’m done.”

“But I’m not.” 

“Alai wa!?”

Gulf heard a snort and the arms around him loosened. Letting go of Jiro, who stayed obediently still, he stood up and turned around. “Hello, P’Great,” he greeted.

“Hello, N’Gulf. It’s nice to finally hear you say hello.” Great beamed at him. The man was dressed casually in a white T-shirt and black shorts, and his hair was unstyled, falling over his forehead. Regardless, he still looked very handsome.

“Well.. It was about time that I did.” He shrugged his shoulders, smiling slightly.

“Aow, does that mean I have to hug you first in the future to get a hello?”

Alai wa?

Great must have noticed his shock because he immediately followed up with another sentence. “I’m kidding, N’Gulf,” he laughed. “You should have seen your ears! They were so red!”

“Phi!!!” he exclaimed. 

“Okay, okay. I’ll stop.” Great put up a hand and that was when Gulf noticed the shopping bags hanging on his elbow. 

“What are those?” he asked, pointing to the paper bags. 

“This?” Great held up the bags. “I’d love to tell you, but can we move inside first? I’m starting to sweat and Jiro is panting quite heavily from the heat. Also, your back is entirely wet.” 

“Oh.” Gulf had momentarily forgotten how hot it was outside because of their exchange earlier. “Okay let’s move inside then,” he said.

They made their way into the front yard of his house and Gulf immediately spotted two cat eyes staring from underneath the lounger on the front porch. Ju was very wary of strangers but she was not territorial and preferred watching from the background before approaching anyone. Jiro on the other hand was completely unaware that there was a cat watching him and followed Great along, sniffing curiously at anything it came across. 

“N’Gulf,” Great called out just before he stepped onto the front porch. “Are you okay with bringing Jiro into the house?”

“It’s fine,” he said. “I asked my Mae already, and besides Ju is currently outside, it might be a better idea to bring him into the house.”

“Aow!” Great started looking around.

“She’s under there,’ he laughed, pointing to the lounger.

“I completely forgot you have a cat, N’Gulf,” Great said. “I’m not sure how Jiro would react to her. He never approaches any of the strays in my neighbourhood.” He turned to Jiro on the lawn, who was currently sniffing behind a pot of bougainvillea.

What a curiously cute pupper.

“Don’t worry, Phi,” he said. “Ju is quite mild-mannered and she doesn’t bite.”

“Aow, just like her owner I see,” Great said, nodding slightly.

“Alai wa, Phi. Of course I don’t bite.”

“I meant the manners-”

Just then Ju emerged from underneath the lounger and cautiously trotted over to Great before circling him, rubbing her body against his leg. Then she sniffed at his toes a few times and very ungracefully plopped onto her side. Her round eyes looking straight up at Great, as if demanding to be petted and loved. 

Gulf stared at both of them.

“N’Gulf, I think she likes me,” Great said, watching in slight amusement. 

“...I think so too,” he said. 

Great squatted down and started stroking Ju lightly. “I think she’s purring,” he said.

Ju was indeed purring. In fact, she looked like she was having the best time of her life. It was unbelievable.

A nudge at his leg caught his attention and Gulf looked down. Jiro had very silently got up to the front porch and was rubbing his head against his knee while glancing forlornly over at Great, who did not even notice that his dog had appeared.

Gulf couldn’t help it anymore. The scene happening in front of him was so comically ridiculous that he let out a loud snort. And the moment the sound came out from his nose, Ju immediately opened her eyes and spotted Jiro. Leaping onto her paws, she scurried back under the lounger in a flash. 

“Oh no you scared her,” Great said, peering at Ju, who had pressed herself closed to the wall.

“It’s okay, Phi,” he said. “She’s just shy because of Jiro. Give her some time.”

“Hmm, okay then.” Great straightened himself and looked over at him. “Aow, I guess now we are even.”

“Why?” Gulf had a feeling he knew why.

“It seems like your cat likes me more than she likes you, just like Jiro seems to like you more than he likes me,” Great said, grinning smugly at him.

Gulf very nearly facepalmed and wanted to tell the man that his dog was jealous of his cat too but decided against it. They had been standing outside long enough and he wanted to bring Great in before his family came out asking questions. “We should head in,” he said.

“Lead the way then,” Great said. “Come on, Jiro.” He pulled at the leash before producing a small treat from his pockets. “Here, this is for being such a good boy.”

Jiro padded happily towards Great and gobbled up the treat instantly, seemingly having forgotten he was sulking moments before. 

_Maybe he isn’t that dense after all._

When they entered the living room, his Mae had just come out from the kitchen and very flusteredly rushed over to greet Great. They exchanged some greetings before the man handed over the shopping bags to her. “Here Mae Nuch, I brought some dried fruits for you. There are also other snacks inside.”

“Oh, you didn’t have to!” his Mae said. “Thank you so much.”

“You’re welcome, Mae Nuch. It’s my first time visiting so I thought I should bring something. Thank you for letting me and Jiro visit.”

His Mae nodded happily and started cooing at Jiro, who had his most adorable puppy eyes on. What a devious little pupper. He was winning hearts whenever he went. So was his owner too.

After his Mae left for the kitchen to prepare some treats for them, he went up to his room to change out of his sweat drenched shirt and came down to the sight of Great chatting with his Pho on the sofa while Jiro laid beside him looking bored.

“Gulf!” his Pho said. “Your friend here was just telling me about you and his dog.”

“Pho? I thought you were out.” Gulf said as he sat down beside Great.

Jiro immediately shifted over and propped his head on Gulf’s lap. He reached out to pet the dog’s head.

“I came back early,” his Pho replied. “So what are you two planning to do later?”

Gulf shrugged. He hadn’t thought about it since all he was concerned with was seeing Jiro again.

“Isn’t there a park nearby?” his Mae stepped out of the kitchen with a tray of snacks that looked like the ones Great bought and a few glasses of iced lemongrass drink. “Maybe you two can go there to play with Jiro. The sun seemed to have gone away anyway so it wouldn’t be as hot.”

Gulf looked out the window, it was indeed less sunny than before. “Sounds good, what do you think?” He turned to Great.

“I’m okay. My objective was to bring Jiro to you so anything else is fine by me.” 

Gulf nodded his head back. 

They started chit-chatting about work and Great shared his experiences filming in Chiang Mai for Manner of Death and hilariously re-enacted his earlier attempts at trying to fit into his very, very tight police uniform.

“I asked the production team if I should lose weight so I could fit into it better but they told me no! It had to be tight!” Great exclaimed. “And then I said, ‘How am I supposed to act if I can’t breathe in it!?’ It was ridiculous!”

“What happened next?” his Pho asked, looking very amused.

“Well, since I started looking constipated on set instead of acting like a proper policeman, they relented in the end and gave me a larger sized uniform to wear.”

“It was still tight though.” Gulf couldn’t resist commenting.

“It was _fitting_.”

“Aow, if you say so.”

Great ignored him and continued with his other stories while Gulf watched on quietly. He was still petting Jiro, who was close to falling asleep. Having heard Great recount his experiences a dozen times during their rehearsals, he wasn’t interested in the details anymore, but it was still interesting to see the man act it out. Gulf liked watching him, Great was very easy on the eyes and he had this pleasant feel about him that wasn’t intimidating, unlike someone he knew.

Also, judging from the light in his parent’s eyes while they listened to Great talk, Gulf could tell they liked him already. Which was a relief, even though generally they were welcoming of his friends, except when dealing with that certain someone of course, where his parents had always been indifferent. 

When the snacks and drinks were finished, Gulf knew it was time to leave. His parents had to head out for errands and he was eager to play with Jiro since Great mentioned he brought his toys along in his car. After exchanging farewells, they got up to leave and was about to step out of the door when his Pho called out for Great.

“Thank you for helping my son the other day. My wife told me you carried him back. I hope he didn’t hurt your back because he’s quite heavy.”

“Pho!-”

“It’s no problem, Khun Phi.” Great smiled. “Your son is a good friend so it was only natural for me to help and he isn’t heavy at all.”

“I see. Well, then Gulf is lucky to have you as a friend. Thanks again. Have fun and... see you next time.” his Pho said, eyes twinkling.

After saying another round of goodbyes, they left the house and that was when Ju appeared out of nowhere. Strangely enough, Jiro did not react but stood very still and watched his cat approach them slowly. Ju circled around them a few times before stopping at Jiro and started rubbing her head against his front paw. The Shiba Inu stared for a moment before bending down to lick her head. 

“Wow.” 

“Aow.” 

“This is amazing,” Great said.

“Yeah.” Gulf had never seen Ju warmed up to anyone so quickly. 

It was a miracle. He was witnessing a miracle. 

“N’Gulf,” Great said.

“Hm?” He was still watching the two pets interacting.

“Does that mean me and Jiro have been accepted into the family?”

“Alai wa?!” Gulf looked up at Great in surprise. 

“Well, your parents like us, you like us and now your cat likes us.” 

“There’s still my sister.”

“She follows me on Instagram and sometimes like my posts, I’d say she likes us already.” Great winked at him.

Gulf rolled his eyes. “I like Jiro, but I never said I like you.”

“Aow, I’m hurt.” Great placed a hand on his chest.

“Not yet anyway,” Gulf mumbled under his breath.

“Alai na?” Great stepped closer, his eyes had lit up and he was smiling. “What did you say?”

“Nothing.” He walked up to the Great and took Jiro’s leash from him. “I’ll head to the park first, you can grab the toys from your car and meet me there.” he said, turning around and leaving the front porch.

Jiro didn’t hesitate and followed along, running to keep up with him and it was when he stepped out of the gate that he heard Great shouted, “I heard that N’Gulf! I heard it!!”

Gulf smiled to himself and left for the park.

* * *

The late afternoon crowd at the park was sparse and the pathways were empty. Gulf strolled leisurely along while enjoying the light breeze that was blowing gently. The sun had completely hidden behind thick fluffy clouds, only appearing sporadically to shine softly on ground. It was a stark contrast to the weather he stood under a few hours ago while waiting for Great.

The man never told him why he was late and when Gulf asked him during their conversation earlier, he had tensed up and changed the subject immediately, which was odd. But Gulf didn’t push for an answer, trusting that Great would eventually tell him. 

When the wound on his leg started to ache, Gulf found a bench to rest on and texted his location to Great. While waiting, he watched Jiro occupied himself with sniffing their surroundings, occasionally stopping to look around. It was a rather relaxing thing to do - watching that is and he would have nearly dozed off if it wasn’t for the loud ping from his phone. 

Great had sent him a text asking if he wanted skewers, which he replied yes to and reminded him to hurry as well. _Before I doze off again_.

 _“Such a demanding nong.”_ Great had said.

 _“You can choose not to buy them if you don’t want to,”_ he replied.

_“Aow, I would never do that.”_

_“Why’s that? Because you want to have them too right?”_ he smiled as he typed the reply.

_“Because I’m completely and utterly smitten with you.”_

Gulf immediately felt heat travelling up from the bottom of his neck all the way to his cheeks and ears. He had totally fallen for that trap. After deliberating for a while on what to reply, Gulf decided on changing the subject instead and told Great to remember to buy some for Jiro. The man thankfully did not pursue the previous line of conversation and just sent a sticker to show his acknowledgement.

He let out a sigh of relief. When Kao told him there was someone else on the project that was smoother than him, Gulf didn’t believe him. But now he did and he wasn’t quite sure what to do with him. Putting away his phone, he called Jiro over to play with so that he wouldn’t doze off again.

That was when he heard a familiar high pitched bark. 

_No. Not again._

What kind of terrible luck was this?

It was the Pomeranian and his terrible owner. Even worse, she was joined by two other women, one wearing a ridiculously pink shirt and the other in a tank top walking their own Pomeranians as well. 

Jiro immediately started growling. “Easy Jiro, it’s okay. I don’t think they will bother us so we can just pretend they are not there.” he said while petting the dog. 

But Gulf was wrong, because the moment the three ladies spotted him, they made a beeline in his direction.

“You! And that stupid dumb dog again!” the woman from before shouted and pointed at him. 

“Don’t call him stupid,” he spat. “You can insult me but you cannot insult Jiro.”

“You think we would waste time with a loser like you? If he’s not paying attention to you why would we?” 

“Then please leave,” he said.

“Aow, this is a public area, we can do whatever we want and you can’t stop us.” said the lady in pink. 

“Then we will leave.” Gulf got up from the bench and started walking away, pulling Jiro along. “Jiro, let’s go,” he said.

“Are you a coward now? Where’s your great saviour? Has he abandoned you with his dog?”

Gulf ignored them and continued walking. 

“Or has he found out how much of a leech you are? Funny, because this afternoon he was defending you again.”

_Defending him? This afternoon?_

“What did you say?” Gulf turned around. “What happened this afternoon?” he asked.

“We saw him at the dog daycare centre picking up that thing over there,” she pointed to Jiro. “And he rudely told us to stay away from you.”

“Then why aren’t you?” he asked.

“Oh please, who is he anyway? Just a small-time actor, a terrible singer and equally terrible model. His words as an artist mean nothing compared to who we represent.”

Like idol, like fan. There was only vitriol and contempt in their words.

Gulf clenched his fist and took a deep breath. “Sure,” he said.

He could do this. He could stay away, avoid conflict, get to somewhere else to wait for Great. Wait for his ray of light to come back. Turning on his heels, Gulf continued walking away. Proud that he had just managed to hold himself back from starting a fight.

“You two would fit well together. Since he’s a leech too.”

Gulf stopped. “He’s not,” he said.

No one was allowed to insult Great. 

No one.

“Riding on the fame of two famous actors? If that’s not leeching, I don’t know what is.” 

“He’s not!” Gulf whipped around. “Great is not a leech!”

The three women were smirking at him while their pomeranians growled, which made Jiro growled back even louder as well. 

“You’re pathetic, Gulf.” the lady in the middle said. “Asking for likes, asking for comments while he ignores you like he should.”

“Yeah, pathetic.”

“ _Pathetic._ ”

He wasn’t pathetic. Gulf knew that. He knew it in his heart, body and soul. And he knew who exactly was the one that was pathetic. 

“I’m not the one that is pathetic, he-”

“Didn’t I tell you three ladies to stay the fuck away?”

It was Great, who had appeared beside him and looked _furious_. 

“Who are you to tell us to stay away!?” the lady from before said.

“You are harassing my friend so I have every right to tell you to. Go. Away.” Great said.

“What if we don’t? What are you going to do? Call the police?” the atrocious lady in pink said.

“Nope. I won’t do that.” Great smirked. “I’ll call all my contacts and let them know who you are. I have your pictures anyway. How do you feel about every person on the Boyfriend project knowing who you are? Or the cast members of the drama I’m in? Do you think who you represent can protect you?”

The three women stared at them in shock before one of them screamed, “You can’t do that! That’s illegal!” 

“Harassment is illegal too.”

That shut the three women up.

And Gulf had enough. He didn’t want to see those women again, ever.

“Phi…” Gulf said, putting a hand on Great’s arm. “Let’s just go.”

“Alright. Are you okay?” Great asked, wrapping an arm around his shoulders.

He nodded his head.

Great turned back to the three ladies. “If I see you three harassing him again, I swear I will take you down so hard, nobody else would be able protect you, not even your precious _Alexander_. N’Gulf may be nice but I’m not. Remember that.”

With that, Gulf was led away and he heard nothing more from the women. Great’s threat must have worked, and he was glad the man stepped in before he could say anything more. That would have made things much worse. 

But then, a part of him still wished he said it, still wished he had been able to express his deepest thoughts, and he did. “I’m not pathetic, P’Great. He is- He’s the one that’s pathetic.” he said, nearly choking.

Great tightened the arm around him. “Yes he is. Pathetic enough to have ignored you. Pathetic enough to have hurt you. And pathetic enough to have let you go.”

“I loved him, Phi,” he said.

“I know.”

“How-”

“I’ve seen how you looked at him.”

If it was that obvious, why didn’t he see it? Why did he have to hurt him like that? 

“It hurts, Phi. Hurts so much.”

Great pulled him to sit on a bench and held his hand tightly. “N’Gulf, tell me how I can help you feel better.” he said.

Gulf didn’t know. He had been feeling sad for the longest time and nothing he did made him feel better. In fact, the only time he hurt less was with Jiro and while talking to Great. But now all he felt was pain, suffocating pain and he wanted to be held, wanted to feel strong arms around him again, but without expectations and empty promises.

He let out a choked sob. “Hold me please?” 

“Oh, N’Gulf. Of course.” Great pulled him into a hug, encasing his entire upper body in warmth and wrapping his sturdy strong arms around him

And that was all it took.

Tears started flowing freely down his face as he let out everything that he had been holding back. From the confusion he felt with the first cryptic post, to the hurt he felt after reading those interviews and the absolute disappointment that crushed him when everything he did later was received with radio silence.

“Why, Phi? Why did he have to do this? Why couldn’t he have made things clear nicely?” he sobbed. “Why did he have to say all those words and make everyone doubt me, misunderstand me and hate me? Why?”

Great patted his head. “I don’t know, N’Gulf. I wished I knew so I could tell you.”

“He knew I loved him! Knew that I admired him, adored him and stood up for him! But all I got in the end was silence! WHY!” he shouted into Great’s shoulders. “I let him take down every single brick around me. I let him into my space. I let him see me in my most vulnerable state. I let him into my heart, and he stomped all over it like it meant nothing to him.”

“I’m sorry, N’Gulf. So sorry.”

“Why…Phi. Why did it have to end this way?”

Gulf felt so tired. He wanted to crawl into a hole and hide from the world forever. Hide from the fans that wrote nasty things about him everyday. Hide from the questioning looks of his coworkers. Hide from the image of the man that continued to haunt his dreams and claw at his heart.

“N’Gulf, none of what happened was your fault. Though I may not know the reasons behind his actions, I know for a fact that none of it had to do with you.” Great said

“How could it not have to do with me!? We were almost together for two years!” Gulf pulled back from the hug, ready to say more and was immediately taken aback. Great had tears running down his face too. “Phi…” he asked. “Why are you crying?” 

“Because you are, N’Gulf,” he said. “You are hurting so I hurt too, so Jiro hurt too.”

With the mention of Jiro, Gulf suddenly became aware that the dog had hopped onto the bench and was pressing his head at his side, looking at him with sad eyes. Gulf didn’t want that, Jiro was supposed to be a happy puppy. Extending his arm, he pulled the dog closer and hugged him as well. “Jiro, don’t be sad.” he said. “Don’t be sad for me.”

“We will be sad with you then,” Great said, wrapping both of them into his embrace. 

The three of them held each other until there were no more tears left from him to cry and the streaks on his face dried up. Gulf didn’t want to leave the safe cocoon he was now in but he knew eventually they had to separate because the sun was setting soon.

“Phi,” he said. “I want to go home.”

“Okay, let’s go back then.”

They left the park and walked back to his place without much talk. The skewers Great bought were in the end fed to Jiro since neither of them had any appetite. When they reached his house, his Mae took one look at him and started asking them questions. 

“Mae Nuch, I’ll tell you what happened. I think N’Gulf needs some rest right now.” Great said.

Gulf nodded at the man gratefully and went up to his room, leaving him with his Mae. Without changing out of his clothes, he flopped onto his bed and closed his eyes.

Sleep came almost immediately.

* * *

_“Goodbye, N’Gulf”_

Gulf stood rooted to the ground and could only watch as the dark silhouette of a figure walked towards the horizon, it’s outline slowly being swallowed by the incandescence of the setting sun. Just like an inevitable ending of a story and a bittersweet conclusion to a movie, it was time for him to move on, to accept reality, no matter how much he didn’t want to.

As tears started streaming down his face, Gulf resisted the urge to scream, to cry out in frustration and instead sobbed quietly, mourning what could have been and what should have been. He was gone now, removed from his life, and the path forward had to be undertaken alone. 

And walk alone he shall.

* * *

When Gulf opened his eyes, his head was pounding and his vision blurry with dried tears. He had no doubt his dream was triggered by his breakdown earlier and the vivid images he saw still gnawed at his heart, but what came with it was also a sense of peace and closure.

He was truly ready to move on. 

The sky outside was still dark and his room was illuminated by soft moonlight shining through the window. Gulf groggily checked his phone. It was about 4am in the morning, which meant he had slept the entire evening away. Sitting up on the bed, he looked around him. There was a cup of milk on his nightstand with some pills and a note beside it.

_Drink this when you wake so you can take the pills if you have a headache._

_\- Great_

After taking the milk and pills, he checked his phone again and noticed a very long text from Great, sent somewhere in the evening.

_“N’Gulf, don’t worry about telling your Mae what happened because I’ve told her everything. She’s angry for you but also sad as well, so remember to talk to her okay? Your family cares very much for you. I met your sister as well and we chatted briefly. I like her, she’s cool. Your Mae had wanted me to stay for dinner but I needed to go so she made me promise to visit again. Does that mean I’m truly accepted into the family now? 55555”_

Gulf made a face at his phone. 

_“Anyway, I just wanted to say again, none of what happened was your fault. The man will never know what kind of gem he lost because he never knew how to appreciate you. But we all do. Your family, friends and myself included. We appreciate you for who you are and would never let you go like he did. I hope you feel better. Take care. I’ll keep sending you pictures of Jiro. It was very, very hard getting him to leave your house so I’m convinced he really loves you more than he loves me but that’s fine because it’s what makes you happy. See you around, N’Gulf.”_

Gulf smiled at his phone. Trust the man to write an essay that could simultaneously make him cringe, snort and nearly cry. 

_“Thank you, P’Great.”_ He typed a reply, hoping that when the man saw his message in the morning, it would bring a smile to his face, just like it did for him.

A loud ping that sounded all of a sudden and it nearly made him drop his phone. 

Great had just sent him a reply. Was the man actually awake at this hour?!

 _“You’re welcome. Why are you awake now?”_ Great asked.

_“Phi, I slept at 5pm… It’s been almost 11 hours and I should be the one asking. Why are you awake now?”_

_“5555 Sorry I forgot what time you slept. How are you feeling?”_

_“Better. Much better. And Phi you didn’t answer my question.”_

_“Which one? I have selective amnesia.”_

Gulf rolled his eyes. Trust Great to still be able to joke in the middle of the night.

 _“Why are you awake?”_ he asked

_“I woke up.”_

He wanted to reach into his phone and slap the man.

_‘Phi, it’s not funny.”_

_“I’m serious!!! I woke up at 3.48am and still haven’t fallen back asleep! Plus I was browsing social media when you texted me!”_

Gulf snorted. _“Oh. So you can’t sleep too?”_ he asked.

_“Yup. You too huh?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“Well, then what are you planning to do now?”_

Gulf suddenly felt like heading out for a walk.

 _“Head out for a walk?”_ he answered.

_“Aow! Serious?”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“Ok, I’ll join you.”_

_“Aow Phi, it’s fine.”_

_“I want to, but that’s if you don’t mind.”_

_“I don’t mind.”_

He was about to type a ‘but’ when the next reply came in.

_“Okay, wait for me, I’ll be at your place in 10mins.”_

Gulf stared flabbergasted at his phone. “Aow,” he said into his dark room. “That was fast.”

Sighing softly, he got off his bed, checked his appearance in the mirror and got out of the house to wait at the gate, but not before writing a note to his parents to inform them he was heading out.

Great appeared in less than ten minutes. “Phew, I’m glad to have been able to sneak out without Jiro. He’s been watching me like a hawk lately.” he said.

“Aow, why?” he asked.

“He thinks I’m meeting you or something. Always sulking when I leave the house without him.”

Gulf laughed at his comment, “Shall we go, Phi?” he asked.

“Yes,” Great smiled.

They walked aimlessly down the streets in silence while soaking in the predawn atmosphere of his quiet neighbourhood. It had rained the night before and the ground was wet. There was earthly scent in the air and a light chill that made the stroll a pleasurable one. Hardly any cars were driving down the road and even fewer pedestrians were walking on the sidewalk. It was nice, Gulf decided - a perfect setting for someone like him who didn’t like crowds and noise. And the best thing was, he didn’t have to worry about bumping into people he never ever wanted to see again. 

Which brought him to a question still lingering in his mind.

“P’Great.” Gulf broke the silence. “Were you late in the afternoon because of those three ladies?”

Great’s strides faltered for a second before returning to normal. “Yes,” he said. “I bumped into them while picking Jiro up.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” he asked.

“I didn’t want you to worry.” 

“Did they give you any trouble?”

Great snorted. “It was actually the other way around.”

“Aow. What happened?”

“Jiro accidentally knocked over a standee outside and it fell on one of the ladies.”

This time it was Gulf that snorted. “Let me guess, they wanted you to take responsibility?”

“Yup. But it was an accident and no one was hurt, so I told them to suck it up and leave us alone.”

“Aow.”

“Yeah, it took a few tries but they eventually left. What a nasty bunch. I even had to tell them to leave you alone because they brought you up again!”

"I don't know why they are so fixated on me," he mused.

“That's because you are successful, and also very gorgeous.”

"Aow."

"And they are jealous."

"Phi, please. I'm not-"

Great whistled and walked ahead of him.

Letting out a sigh, Gulf followed behind and said no more.

As they turned around a corner, Gulf noticed they had arrived at the entrance of the park. Great gestured for him to sit at a bench nearby and he did, stretching out his legs while leaning back on his palms. 

“How’s your leg?” Great asked.

“It’s mostly healed, but the scar might take awhile to go away I think,” Gulf answered.

“Does it still hurt?”

“A little, more if I run.”

“Can I see?”

Gulf nodded and twisted around, propped both of his feet on the bench and pointed to the healing wound on the side of his shin. “Here,” he said.

Great reached out with his hand and gingerly brushed the side of his wound before taking hold of both his legs and pulling them onto his lap. 

“Phi?”

“I’m sorry I couldn’t stop them in time the other day.” Great said, still rubbing his shin gently.

“Alai wa, Phi. You couldn’t have known the dog would attack me.” he said.

Great let out a soft sigh. “I know, but I still feel bad. I don’t like seeing you hurt N’Gulf.”

“How long?” he blurted out.

Great tilted his head to the side. “What do you mean?” 

“How long have you- have you not like seeing me hurt?” he asked.

“You mean how long I’ve been smitten.”

He nodded his head.

“Ever since I first saw you on that drama with _him_ ,” Great answered without hesitation.

A year. 

No. 

More than a year. 

Great had feelings for him for more than a year. 

“I- That long?” he asked.

“I wasn’t as smitten initially, just admired you from afar. It was when I truly got to know you from the project that I-” Great smiled.

“That you?”

“Fell completely and utterly in love with you.”

Gulf blinked. The impact of Great’s words was greater than he imagined. It nearly took his breath away, made his body tremble and his heart soar. 

“N’Gulf?” Great looked at him in concern.

“Why?” he breathed.

“I’ve said most of it last week.” Great said, shifting his body closer until Gulf was nearly sitting on his lap. “That you are sincere, kind, loyal and you have the most beautiful smile I’ve ever seen.”

“Do- Do you really mean that?” he asked, voice trembling.

Great reached out and placed his palm on his face. “With every inch of my heart. The moment I saw you for the first time that day at the photoshoot, I knew my heart had been taken away.”

“Phi…”

The thumb on his cheek started gently rubbing. “N’Gulf, I’m telling you all this now because I want to be honest, but at the same time I don’t want you to feel obligated to return my feelings. No matter what you choose to do, know that I will always be by your side, as a friend, as a Phi, as a colleague or… as a faen.” Great said. 

Gulf could feel his eyes watering. Every word that Great said so far had been words he was desperate to hear from him for the past two years and to hear them uttered so sincerely from someone else _hurt_. But at the same time it also felt healing. 

Was this what moving on truly felt like?

“Thank you,” he said. It was all he could come up with. 

Great smiled fondly before taking both his hands in his own. “Can I ask for something?” 

He nodded his head.

“Will you let me help you rebuild your walls?” Great asked.

“What do you mean?”

“You said he took down your walls brick by brick.”

“Oh.”

Great squeezed his hands. “I want to help you rebuild them. Help you stack each brick back on top of one another until the walls are high enough that you feel safe. I won't let you feel exposed and vulnerable again.”

“But Phi, if I build up my walls again, how do I let anyone in?”

_How would I let you in?_

“I’ll build a door for you and hand you the key so only you can open it.” Great said. “Then, I’ll give you mine as well so you can unlock my door anytime you want or anytime you feel unsafe.”

A safe haven. Great was offering him unconditional sanctuary.

“You will?” he whispered.

And protection.

“Yes, I’ll protect yo-”

Gulf lunged forward, wrapping his arms tightly around Great’s shoulders and burying his head into the crook of his neck. “Okay, Phi. Ok-” he choked. “I’ll let you help me. Help me rebuild my walls, Phi. Help me build the doors too.”

Great drew him closer until he was sitting on his lap. “Thank you, N’Gulf,” he said. “Thank you for giving me this chance.”

Gulf was not alone. 

There were people willing to walk the road ahead with him. Great, his family and his friends. Also not to forget, Jiro as well.

He would not have to take the path ahead on his own. 

“Thank you, Phi.” he breathed. 

They stayed in the embrace until the first ray of sunlight appeared and shone on the dew covered grass all around them, creating a sea of brilliant glittering lights bathed by soft orange glow. 

It was beautiful, as beautiful as the new beginning that was starting for him. 

Where the sun had set for the book he was closing, it was rising for the new chapter he was writing. 

“Are you seeing this, N’Gulf?” Great asked.

“Yeah, it’s beautiful,” he said.

“Just like you.”

Gulf couldn’t help but snort. “Such a smooth talker.”

“But you like this smooth talker, don’t you?”

Rolling his eyes, Gulf pulled away from the embrace and looked straight at Great. “Maybe.” He smirked. “Probably.”

“Aow!” Great exclaimed. “Is that all? I’m hurt.”

“Well, then.” He said, leaning in and placing a kiss on the side of Great’s lips. “Is this enough?” he asked.

All he got was a dumbfounded look. 

“Phi?” 

Great blinked and a broad smile slowly appeared on his face. He brought Gulf’s hand to his lips and pressed a soft kiss to his knuckles. “Yes, it’s enough.”

Gulf smiled back.

“I’m glad Jiro found you.” Great said.

“Me too,” he said.

“You two are quite similar.”

“Aow.” 

“Brave. Loyal. Strong-willed. Confident…”

Gulf nodded along happily.

“Temperamental. Stubborn. Sometimes difficult…”

“Alai wa.” Gulf glared halfheartedly at the man, still smiling.

“But still very na-rak.” 

Gulf blinked, feeling heat pooling at his ears again. 

“So na-rak that I can’t resist...” Great leaned in until the tip of his nose brushed against his lightly.

Gulf shuddered. “That you can’t resist what, Phi?” he whispered.

“Do you really not know?” 

Gulf shook his head slightly and smiled, interlacing his fingers behind Great’s neck. “Why don’t you show me then?” he asked playfully.

And Great did. 


	3. Tii Rak

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A chance encounter with the past. Some very hot moments. And a heartfelt confession.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My last and final chapter.
> 
> Enjoy.

_Two months later..._

“If you keep feeding him, he’s not going to fit into the collar anymore.” 

Great was watching him feed scraps from his plate to Jiro, who had been staring at him with puppy eyes ever since he started eating. The juvenile Shiba Inu had whined constantly and kept prodding at his legs until Great sternly told him to stay still, to which the dog responded by sulking underneath their table, refusing to acknowledge either of them. 

That was when Gulf gave in.

“Alai, Phi,” he said. “It’s only scraps from my plate.”

“How can you say it’s scraps when there’s still half a chicken thigh on your plate!?” Great exclaimed.

“Phi,” Gulf said. “I’m not that hungry anyway.”

Great gave him an exasperated look, one that he was used to seeing because he always ended up feeding Jiro when they were out together. “At this rate, I’m going to have to rename Jiro to Buta instead.”

“Aow,” Gulf let out. “What’s a buta?”

“You.”

“Alai naaaa, Phi. Tell me.” Gulf grumbled as he sliced more meat to feed Jiro. 

Great snorted. “Whose the one that fell asleep while waiting for me?”

“You were late!”

“Only by ten minutes! You slept for more than half an hour!”

“You could have woke me up!”

“You were sleeping like a pig!”

_Wait a minute._

“Aow.” Gulf placed his knife down. “Buta means pig?”

“Yes,” Great grinned widely at him.

Gulf glared at the man. “Well, if I’m a pig, then what does that make-“

That was when he saw him. 

“Make what, N’Gulf?”

A familiar figure with pink hair, sunglasses and a garish outfit appeared from the corner of his eye and Gulf nearly dropped the fork he was holding. The tall man who had just walked into the restaurant was flanked by three women, all looking decked out in design labels and wearing supercilious expressions on their faces. They scanned the cafe floor like stars who had just stepped onto the red carpet, only that no one was actually paying them any attention.

No one except for him.

“Nong?” 

Gulf couldn’t take his eyes off them, even though the head of their entourage looked like he had been dipped in melted sprinkles and left out to dry in the sun for days on end. It wasn’t a pretty look, and despite all that, he had expected the usual pull in his heart but instead felt nothing. Where he thought there would be regrets and pain, there was only indifference, because the person whom he used to spend every single day thinking about no longer existed. All that left of his massive transformation was a caricature of his former self. 

“N’Gulf?” 

He felt warmth cover his hand and that finally drew his attention back to Great, who was looking at him with worried eyes. 

“Are you okay?” Great asked. 

Gulf blinked at him. “I’m okay, Phi.” he said, before he felt a nudge on his knee. Jiro had emerged from underneath the table and was prodding his leg, looking at him in concern as well. “I’m okay, Jiro. Really.” He reached down to pet the puppy.

“What happened?” Great asked. The frown on his face had deepened.

Gulf looked over at the four new patrons.

Great followed his line of vision and immediately his expression changed. “Shia…” he cursed. “Is that…”

“Yeah,” he answered.

“Do you want to leave?” Great asked. “We can pack the remaining food and head somewhere.”

Gulf shook his head. “No, Phi. It’s okay.” he said. “We are finishing anyway.” He was okay, but whatever appetite he still had was gone now - too put off by the sight of _him_.

“Alright,” Great said and quietly went back to finishing the last of his meal.

Gulf continued feeding Jiro the remaining food on his plate and was relieved for the silence. He needed time to process what he just saw but at the same time he couldn’t help but steal glances at the table across them. All four patrons were busy checking their phones and didn’t seem like they had noticed their presence. Gulf wanted to keep it that way, since he wasn’t sure how things would go if they were to interact. 

And instantly, the thought of having a conversation with him made Gulf shiver.

“Nong, what’s wrong?”

“Hmm?” He looked back up at Great after feeding the last piece of chicken to Jiro.

“You looked like you shivered. Are you cold?” Great asked, concern etched on his face again.

_Ah. He noticed._

“It’s nothing. I just had a very scary thought, that’s all.” he smiled. 

Great narrowed his eyes at him. “Alai na? What scary-“

“Are you done?” Gulf interjected, not in any mood to answer any more questions. “I’m done already. We can leave now.”

“Oh.” Great blinked. “You want to leave now?” 

Gulf nodded his head. 

“Okay, let me foot the bill first,” Great said as he got up from his seat.

“I’ll wait outside with Jiro,” he offered. 

“Okay, I’ll see you outside.”

While Great headed over to the counter, Gulf began to untie Jiro’s leash from his chair. The Shiba Inu seemed to notice they were leaving and got up excitedly, trotting to his side while wagging his bushy tail. 

Gulf let out a small laugh. “Hold on Jiro, let me untie this and we can go.” 

When he finally got the leash loose, they both made their way to the entrance but midway he realized a new set of crowd had arrived and the direct way to the entrance was blocked. Looking around the restaurant, he tried finding another way out, and to his utter dismay, the only alternative route required him to pass by the table with the four patrons. 

_Shia. What kind of dumb luck is this?_

Gulf peered over at the counter. Great was still waiting behind a line of customers to pay and chatting animatedly with the manager, who was a friend of his. He did not seem to notice his sudden predicament. 

It was starting to look like he would have no choice but to deal with this alone. If he was discreet enough there wouldn’t be any confrontation. In fact, he shouldn’t even be worrying in the first place because he wasn’t the one that wanted to break off contact, so technically, unless he said something, no one would speak to him.

_Right?_

Gulf could do this. He had been through far worse and emerged unscathed. If he could survive dealing with three rabid fans with equally rabid pomeranians, he could do this.

Squaring his shoulders, he tugged at Jiro’s leash and headed in the direction of his past. All seemed well initially, as no one in the entourage noticed his careful wading around the tables until all of a sudden, just as he was about to pass them, a chair shot out of nowhere in front of him.

Gulf halted his steps immediately. 

His route to the other side of the restaurant had been rudely obstructed by a woman with brown hair and pink hairband.

It was Tammy. _His_ manager.

“Alai wa…” he muttered under his breath.

“Oh look! Who do we have here?” 

“It’s N’Gulf!”

“Why didn’t you say hi, N’Gulf?”

Gulf gritted his teeth, refusing to look in the direction of the table. “Hi. Can you excuse me? I have to go.”

“Why the rush, N’Gulf?” Tammy smirked at him. “Your new boy toy-”

Gulf glared at her. 

“Oops, I meant your new boyfriend is waiting?”

“Yes,” he sneered. “I have to go, please let me pass.”

“Why?”

“Because you’re blocking my way.”

“Aow,” Tammy said before leaning back. “I was just sitting back, you can always go in another direction.”

Gulf resisted the urge to hurl the cup of water on the table at her. “You know damn well the way is blocked and this is the only way I can get out, so move.”

“So rude,” Tammy’s sister's voice sounded from his side. “Is that how you speak to your seniors? Show some respect.”

_How can you remain quiet?_

In the midst of their conversation, Gulf realized he never said a single word, never stepped in to diffuse the situation, nor come to his aid. All this while, he should have known better than to trust him for protection, because his true colours shone brighter than the blinding mishmash of hues he was wearing from head to toe. 

Gulf really should have known. Now he was reaping the consequences of his blunder and the result of his misplaced trust. 

Even then, he would not be undermined.

“Let me pass.”

“So you can go back to your manwhore?”

Something inside him snapped.

“What did you just say?” Gulf leveled his most heated glare at the four sorry excuses of human beings sitting around the table. “What did you just call P’Great?”

The woman who spoke - a friend of Tammy’s, looked taken aback by the vitriol in his voice. “I was just joking,” she said.

“Well it didn’t sound like a joke,” he spat. 

“But you are,” Tammy said. 

‘Alai wa!” Gulf raised his voice, which was something he very seldom did. 

He was losing control.

“You hang around with different boys all the time, selling and promoting things nobody wants to buy.” Tammy said smugly. “Must be sad being abandoned and having to find new Phis to take care of you huh? So pathetic.”

_You are not pathetic._

In an instant, the angry fire that was blazing inside him snuffed out completely. Gulf would not be baited; he would not lose control. The games they were playing with him didn’t work anymore. He was stronger than this, better than this and he was going to serve them back exactly what they were serving him.

As if sensing a change in his demeanor, Jiro suddenly growled from beside him. “Easy, Jiro,” he said. “I’ll handle this.” The low rumble from Jiro slowly subsided and he shot him a questioning look. He smiled and patted the dog’s head gently. “Good boy,” he said.

“What a dumb-”

“Shut up,” he said. “It was rude enough of you to block my way, and called P’Great names, so don’t go insulting Jiro.”

“I wasn’t-”

“And you are wrong, I’m not promoting or selling things nobody wants to buy. In fact sales have been great and you know it, so I would like to ask, how’s the sale of your _pillows_?”

“Watch it,” Tammy’s sister warned.

“Watch what? Watch the three of you here try to sound all high and mighty when you’re not? I seemed to remember someone telling me you were begging for likes on-”

“Stop.” _He_ finally spoke. “Phi, just let him pass.”

Tammy shot him an indignant look. “No.”

Gulf was done being nice. “You know, my sweet puppy here has a habit of peeing at people he doesn't like, so since you are blocking our way…” He turned to Jiro. “Come Jiro, it’s time for you to pee. Come.” Pulling at the leash, he guided Jiro to Tammy’s chair and _whistled_. 

That was when Jiro raised his hind leg, and Tammy immediately let out a loud shriek, nearly falling onto the ground as she scurried away from him. 

Gulf had to resist snorting.

“How dare you-” Tammy’s face was very red. 

“Whatever.” he said, pushing the chair away and finally stepping through to the other side of the restaurant. “And you know what? I’m glad to be able to work with so many others. They have brought me so much fun and so many more opportunities. But look at you bunch, burning bridges and torching relationships wherever you go.”

“N’Gulf, just go.” 

_You only ever knew how to tell me to go, but never knew to tell me to stay._

“Not without saying this,” he continued. “At least now there’s someone who loves me. Someone who appreciates me for who I am. Someone who's willing to understand me without tearing down my walls. He’s a great man and I have to say, it’s hard not to fall in love with him too.”

With that, Gulf turned on his heels and made his way to the entrance of the restaurant. His heart pounded rapidly against his chest and his hands shook from the rush of adrenaline pulsing through his veins. The look on his face had been priceless. It was a mixture of shock and maybe… regret, but Gulf didn’t care, he felt like another weight had been taken off his chest and he could breathe easier now. 

He felt free.

“N’Gulf!” 

It was Great, he finally settled the bill.

“Hey, you done?” he asked. 

Great gave him a puzzled look. “Yeah- what happened-“ He pointed back at the restaurant. 

“It’s nothing, Phi.” 

“But-“

“I want to go home.”

Despite feeling near eureka moments ago, the confrontation has taken a huge toll on him and all he wanted to do now was head back to the comfort of his home. 

“N’Gulf…”

“Please, I’ll tell you more next time. Can we just go?” he begged.

Great let out a sigh. “Okay,” he said, taking hold of his hand. “Let’s go then.”

And off they went. 

* * *

  
“I’ll see you, Phi. Thanks for lunch.” Gulf said while unbuckling his seatbelt. “And bye Jiro.” He reached out to pat the dog’s head before turning away to open the car door.

“N’Gulf.”

“Hmm?” He turned back and was immediately pulled into a deep kiss. “Phi?” he breathed. “Why-”

“Just wanted to kiss my faen. That’s all.” Great smiled widely.

Gulf returned the smile in full. “Then I’ll do the same.” And he leaned in to give Great a peck on his lips. “Drive safely, Phi.”

“Rest well, N’Gulf,” Great said. 

Turning back to the door, Gulf got out of the car and watched as it drove away with a strange feeling in his chest. He felt bad for not telling Great about his confrontation at the restaurant, but he couldn’t bring himself to repeat the sequence of events to him, not when he wanted to forget about it altogether. 

With a slightly heavy heart, he made his way back into the house and straight up to his room after casually greeting his family. Flopping on his bed, he let out a long sigh of relief. Nothing beat the comfort and safety of his own room.

A ping sounded from his phone. Thinking it might be from Great, he took a look at it and his heart sank immediately. It was a text from _him_.

After nearly three months of silence, he finally texted him.

_“Sorry about Tammy. I hope you didn’t take it too seriously. She was just joking.”_

Gulf felt like throwing his phone against the wall. Joking? How was what he went through just a joke? He was about to type a long, incensed reply when something stopped him. 

_What if this was another bait?_

Gulf didn’t want, or need to know. Deleting the message, he put away his phone and got up from the bed. The reply reminded him of an incident that happened a long time ago. A fight they had that till this day still sometimes left a hollow feeling inside him. 

Digging through his drawers, he took out a bunch of Polaroids that were tied together. They were all taken during the filming of the first season of their drama. Most were from their trip to Koh Samet, when they filmed his scenes back home. He couldn’t remember what triggered the fight between them but knew it was over something trivial. He had ignored him for the entire journey to the island and Gulf had followed him around like a long lost puppy.

It was pathetic really. 

If Mame didn’t intervene, maybe they would have fought for longer or maybe his silent begging for attention would have worked. But did it matter anymore? After they started talking again, which unsurprisingly happened right after he apologized, as with how most of their quarrels ended, he had attempted to apologize as well. 

_“Sorry nong, hope you didn’t take it too seriously. I wasn’t actually that mad. Just wanted to tease you.”_

Gulf never knew an apology could sound like an non-apology until that day and it left the same feeling he had inside him right now. 

Hollow and empty. 

Just then, a piece of Polaroid fell out of the bunch. He picked the photo up and noticed it was the one taken just as they had arrived at Koh Samet. It showed both of them smiling into the camera. Gulf recalled they haven’t made up from their fight then, that’s why his smile didn’t reach his ears but he looked happy and unaffected. 

As if _he_ hadn’t really been sulking at all. As if it was all a facade, a ploy to get Gulf to grovel at _his_ feet.

As if _he_ was playing a game with him. 

And Gulf had been played all the way. 

His vision blurred as angry tears welled up in his eyes. How could he have not seen it? How could he have not seen the deception? How? 

Stuffing the photo into his pockets, he took hold of his wallet, phone and a jacket and headed out of his room. Skipping down the stairs, he announced that he was heading out and coming home late before leaving the house. 

“Nong!” his sister called out. 

He stopped at the stairs of the patio and turned back. “Yes, P’Grace?” 

“Where are you going? How come you’re coming home late?” Grace looked more concerned than usual. 

“Aow. I’m always coming home late, why are you suddenly interested?”

“Just tell me where you are heading.” 

“Koh Samet,” he said and turned to walk towards the gate.

“Alai na?!” Grace shouted. “It’s afternoon already! What are you going to do there?!”

“Facing my past,” he replied and left for the main road.

Grace didn’t go after him, much to his relief and he managed to hail a cab easily since it was a weekday afternoon. The cab driver gave him an odd look when he asked to head to Ban Phe Pier but did not ask why, only telling him it would be expensive. The few hours on the road passed quicker than he thought as he went through every single interaction he had with _him_ over the past two years and by the time he got to the pier, it was almost dusk. 

The sky was lightly dusted gold and the sea breeze blowing was cool and refreshing - a stark contrast to the dusty and crowded city centre of Bangkok. Gulf quickly bought a ticket for the ferry and thankfully made the one that was just about to leave, which meant he could make it for the sunset.

It had been a while since he watched the sunset at a beach and the last time he did was with _him_. They had chatted about their dreams and aspirations while watching the sun slowly dipped beneath the horizon. It was one of the many moments he still kept dear to his heart despite all the hurt and pain he suffered. 

Despite having been callously rejected and casted aside.

By the time he reached the island, the sky was engulfed in fiery orange and he quickly made his way to the beach. It was empty, as expected from the unfilled ferry and he sat on a large rock facing the sea, watching as the waves fueled by strong winds crash onto the shore, bringing along distant memories with them.

_“I hope we stay together for a long time, N’Gulf.”_

“You liar,” he spoke into the wind.

_“And I hope I’ll always be there to protect you.”_

“YOU LIAR!! YOU PROMISED TO ALWAYS PROTECT ME!!” he screamed while getting off the rock. “And yet the person who hurt me the most WAS YOU!!!” 

Gulf stopped just shy of the water. “Tell me why,” he said. “TELL ME WHY!! P’ME-“

Warmth enveloped him. 

And he froze.

Looking down, he saw two strong arms wrapped around his torso and a familiar looking leather watch worn on one of the wrist. 

Great. It was Great. 

“Phi? How-”

“Grace told me. I saw you at the pier and followed you.”

“Oh.”

The arms tightened around him as Great perched his chin on the back of his shoulder. “Why didn’t you tell me you were upset?”

“I wasn’t at first,” he said. It was the truth, he hadn’t been upset until he received the text. Or maybe he was all along, just that he didn’t notice. 

“I heard you.”

Gulf nearly snorted. “I was exactly holding back, P’Great.”

“No, at the restaurant.”

Great had seen them. Why didn’t he step in then?   
“You were so brave, nong,” Great said, as if he knew what Gulf was thinking. “I wanted to step in initially but decided to stay back because you seemed like you wanted to deal with it alone. I’m glad I did because if not, I wouldn’t have witnessed your brilliant comeback.”

“Was I?” Gulf asked.

“Hmm?”

“Brave.”

“Very.”

His eyes stung. Gulf wasn’t sure if it was from the salt in the wind or the tears that were threatening to spill.

Brave. He had been brave. 

“It’s beautiful,” Great said.

It was indeed beautiful. The water sparkled as it moved gently under the soft glow of the setting sun and the once fiery orange sky now had strokes of purple and pink. It was like a scene straight out of a painting and he was watching it with Great.

They were creating a new memory in place of an old one. 

“Yeah.” Gulf wiggled his arms free and placed them over Great’s. “Thank you, Phi. For giving me space and… for looking out for me.”

“You may be my nong, but you are also your own person. I can’t take the ability to stand up for yourself away from you.” Great said. “The person I became utterly and completely smitten with is not someone I want to be seen as weak or powerless.”

“I’m not helpless,” Gulf said.

“No, you are not.”

“But I trusted the wrong person.”

“We all make mistakes once in a while.”

“He lied.”  
“Yes, he did.”

“It wasn’t my fault.”

“No, it wasn’t.”

Gulf dug into his pockets and took out the wrinkled polaroid. 

“What’s this?” Great asked.

“Picture of us during filming,” he said.

“You both looked happy.”

“I wasn’t really, but he was. We had a fight.”

“I see.”

The more Gulf looked at the picture, the more repulsed he felt. He wanted the image out of his sight and out of his mind. 

He wanted it gone.

Crumpling the polaroid in his hand, he threw it into the sea and watched as it became soaked with water and sank underneath the oncoming waves. 

“Do you feel better?” Great asked.

“A little,” he said. “I might feel even better if I threw them all away.”

Great snorted. “Do you need help? I could lend you Jiro.”

“Aow,” he let out. “What is he going to do? Eat them?”

“Well, judging from the state of my slippers this morning, probably tear them apart.” 

Gulf laughed. “Was that why you were late?” he asked.

“Yes.”

He laughed even louder.

“I love the sound of your laugh.”

And I love the sound of yours too.

“Thanks,” Gulf said.

“Did you mean what you said at the restaurant?” Great asked.

“Mean what?”

“That it’s hard not to fall in love with me.”

Taking one last look at the disappearing sun, Gulf turned around and took hold of Great’s face in his palms. Then, he placed a peck on his lips. 

“Is that a good enough answer?” he asked.

A faint smile appeared on Great’s face. “Yes,” he said and pulled him into another deep, long kiss. 

Great was a gentle kisser. He never overly prodded, nor forcibly pulled at his lips. His kisses were like the careful coaxing of a patient lover, filled with tenderness and consideration, just like how he was when it came to their relationship. Gulf felt lighter than ever before, but he wasn’t sure if it was because of the kiss, or because the remaining weight that had been pressing on his chest all this while had been lifted.

“N’Gulf,” Great breathed. “We should leave soon, it’s getting dark.”

“Should we head to the pier?”

“I don’t think there are any more ferries going back. They don’t operate at night.”

“Aow,” he let out. “I forgot about that.”

Great gave him a disapproving look. “Then you shouldn’t have ran all the way to a far off island by yourself.”

“You found me didn’t you?” Gulf teased.

Great pulled him closer until their bodies were pressed together. “Yes, and I’m never letting you off so easily again.” 

Gulf hooked his arms around the man’s neck. “Well then, now that you caught me, where should we go?”

“N’Gulf, this is a resort island,” Great said. “There’s only one place we can go now.”

“Book a room and stay the night?”

A devilish grin appeared on Great’s face. “But of course.”

* * *

Despite the many hidden innuendos in their conversation earlier, Gulf had never actually shared a room with Great before. Heck, they hadn’t even done anything beyond casual groping except during that one time when their very heated kiss nearly resulted in one of them getting naked. He had remembered how the hard abs felt under his fingers and how he had wanted to rip Great’s top off so he could feel them in plains of muscles under his palm.

Of course Great had stopped him, which he was grateful for because back then he was in no state of mind to engage in anything further. And if he had lost control, Gulf knew he would have regretted it. Having sex while carrying a baggage full of hurt and regrets was not a good idea. 

But what if the baggage had been lifted?

The room they had booked for the night came with an amazing view of the beach. Business was slow during this time of the year and they were lucky to get a premium room at a reasonable rate. Gulf was all showered and wrapped in a soft fluffy bathrobe. He was laying against the headboard of the enormous king sized bed and randomly scrolling through his phone. 

Also, he was very nervous.

Even though Gulf was not completely clueless since he did play out very steamy scenes in a drama, he was still very anxious about what might or might not happen in the next few moments when Great finally finishes with his shower. He knew very intimately how things worked traditionally but was inexperienced when it came to the actual act itself between two men. 

In short, he was still a virgin in that sense.

Gulf let out a sigh.

“What’s wrong?”

The phone nearly flew out of his hands when he jumped. “Alai, Phi! You-” Gulf blinked.

Great had just stepped out of the bathroom wearing only a towel wrapped around his torso. His hair was wet and dripping water that slowly slid down his wide shoulders, down his defined pecs and along his washboard abs.

Gulf swallowed.

Great let out a small laugh. “Like what you see, N’Gulf?”

_Very much._

He immediately shifted his gaze upwards. “Maybe,” he teased.

“Aow,” Great let out, looking slightly disappointed before turning around and heading back towards the bathroom.

“Where are you going, Phi!?” 

“To get dressed.”

“Oh.”

“Unless… you don’t want me too?” Great asked, his face wearing the same devilishly grin he had on earlier.

“I-“ The words got caught in his throat.

Gulf felt like an idiot. It was obvious Great wanted something more and he was screwing it up by being a mute. 

“N’Gulf.”

Great had magically appeared by his side and he instinctively sat up straighter. “Yes, P’Great?”

“Are you scared?” The man reached out to stroke his face. 

“A little,” Gulf answered. 

“Do you trust me?”

“Yes.”

“Can I kiss you?”

“Yes.”

This time, the kiss was different. It was fiery, urgent and full of desire. As Great slowly worked away his nervousness with each nudge of his lips, Gulf felt himself being shifted until he was lying on his back and underneath Great’s very hard and warm body. 

So hot. Gulf felt like he was on fire and suddenly he wanted more, much more than this. 

He wanted Great.

“Phi…” he broke away from the kiss. “Don’t stop. I want- I want you.” he said softly.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes,” he breathed. 

And Great attacked his neck with fevour, sucking and licking at a spot that nearly made him see stars. 

“I’ll make you feel really good, N’Gulf. Better than you ever felt before.” 

“Yes, Phi. Make me feel good.”

As Great continued kissing his neck and sometimes moving to lick at his ears, Gulf felt his robe being untied and gently slid off his shoulders. Hands started brushing, exploring all over his body and then all of a sudden it stopped. 

The warmth around him was gone.

Gulf opened his eyes and saw dark, hungry eyes staring at him. Great had sat up and was breathing heavily, his chest glistening with water and sweat. 

“Phi?” Gulf reached out to lightly brush his favorite abs.

“Are you absolutely sure about this?” Great asked.

His fingers followed the trail of hair below Great’s belly button until the edge of the towel where he noticed something poking out from underneath it. Continuing on their initial course, he brushed his fingers against the bulge, which elicited a hiss from the man.

“Yes, Phi. I want this.“ He pointed to the bulge. “Inside me.” 

That was when he heard Great taking in a sharp intake of breath and he ripped his towel off, revealing what was hiding underneath. A long, hard cock sticking out from a generous amount of dark curly hair.

Gulf swallowed. 

“Like what you see, N’Gulf?”

“Yes.”

Next thing he knew, Great was tearing his robes off and sliding his boxers down, letting free his own erection as well. And they both fell back onto the bed kissing and grinding their bodies together. 

Being with a man felt surreal. The bodies he was used to hugging were soft and nimble but this was different, he was holding onto rock solid muscles that hid power and strength underneath them.

And that _excited_ him.

“Nong, I need to prepare you. Wait for me.” Great said as he disentangled their bodies and got off the bed.

Gulf let out a soft cry at the loss of heat around him and watched as Great headed over to rummage through his bag, admiring the way his back muscles moved.

“You love to stare, don’t you?” Great said when he came back with the items he was looking for. 

“Aow.” Gulf licked his lips. “Phi likes to stare too.”

“Of course I do and the more I stare…” Great started moving closer, climbing back on top of him. 

“The more you stare…?” 

Great pressed their lips deeply together. “The more I stare, the more I want to make you scream.”

_Oh._

“Well, Phi,” he said, “Make me scream then.”

Great winked before motioning for him to spread his legs and hold them apart with his hands. Gulf did what he was told, trying not to blush when he realized how exposed he was in front of the man. Then, Great squeezed a generous amount of lube on his fingers and got to work. 

“Relax okay? This will feel weird at first.” Great said and he slowly pressed a finger inside him.

It felt strange and cold but not entirely unpleasant. The finger wiggled and pressed about. At first, his muscles tightened in response but they slowly relaxed and gave in with each prod of the finger. 

Soon, Great added a second finger and did the same. It was when he added the third one that Gulf grimaced at the uncomfortable stretch of his muscles and the pain nearly made his erection go away.

“You okay?” Great stopped moving his fingers. “We can pause first. Tell me if you are in pain. Don’t hold it in.”

Gulf nodded his head and Great reached out with his other hand to stroke his cheek, looking at him with tender eyes. “You are beautiful, N’Gulf. So brave, kind and loyal. I cannot describe how blessed I am to have you with me.”

“Phi…” he breathed.

_Me too._

“Relax. Let me take care of rest.” Great smiled, taking one of his legs to hook over his shoulder while letting the other fall to the side. “Now your hands will be free to touch me.” 

And he did, brushing his hands all over Great’s shoulders and pecs.

Unbeknownst to him while they were talking, the fingers inside him started moving again but this time there was less resistance and the pressure was much more bearable. They prodded deeper and deeper until all of sudden, one of them brushed against something inside him. 

Gulf let out a loud cry. “What was that?” he panted. 

“Told you I’ll make you scream,” Great grinned.

“Phi… you- AH!”

Great was relentless with his prodding and kept pressing against the spot inside him. All Gulf could do was thrash about and whimpered helplessly in need. If that was already what his fingers could do, then what about his-

“Phi… when are you going to-“ Gulf moaned. “When-“ He was losing control. 

“Open your eyes, N’Gulf. I want to see them.” Great said. “When what?”

Gulf opened his eyes. “Put it inside me,” he said.

“Put what?” Great smiled devilishly. 

“Put your cock inside me!” he cried out.

“Oh Tii Rak, I’ll be doing more than just putting my cock inside you…”

Great withdrew his fingers and he whined at the sudden emptiness. “I’ll be driving you into the bed, making you scream with every thrust…”

His own cock twitched.

“Hurry up!” 

”Tsk, such a demanding nong.” Great reached for something at his side and produced a small package

Gulf stopped him with his hand. 

“Nong? I have to put it on.” Great looked at him confused.

“I’m clean,” he said.

Great frowned. “It’s not about that, I know you are but-“

“Come inside me.”

“N’Gulf, it’s your first time!”

“Please…” he begged. “I want to feel all of you inside me.”

Great let out a sigh and put aside the piece of plastic. “Okay then.”

After spreading a generous amount of lube on his cock, Great hooked both of his legs on his shoulders, and shifted their bodies until Gulf felt something poking at his entrance.

“Are you ready, N’Gulf?” Great asked.

Gulf nodded his head gingerly.

And Great leaned forward, pressing in slowly.

The pressure was unlike anything Gulf had felt before, and even with all the preparation done earlier, his body was not ready for something so big and wide. His entrance felt like it was stretched to the maximum and as Great pushed deeper, his previously pliant walls started to clench up as well. 

Worse of all, it _hurt_. 

“Nong?” Great stopped moving. 

“Phi…” he whimpered. “It hurts.”

“Look at me, N’Gulf.” 

Gulf felt warmth on his cheek and he opened his eyes. 

Great was looking at him in concern and stroking his cheek. “Does it still hurt? Do you want me to pull out?”

“No!” he exclaimed. “Don’t pull out. Just give me some time.”

Gulf wanted Great badly and if he had to put up with a bit of pain, it was worth it. After all, Great had waited so long for him to be ready, the least he could do was grit his teeth and go along with it, no matter how much it hurt.

“It still hurts doesn’t it?”

His eyes shot open again. “N-No,” he said.

Great let out a sigh and moved away, pulling out his cock as well. 

“Phi! No-” He sat up immediately. 

It felt empty again and he hated it. 

Great moved to sit cross-legged leaning against the headboard and gestured for him. “Come here, N’Gulf. Trust me. Come.”

Gulf slowly crawled towards Great and the man pulled him onto his lap. “Phi?” he asked.

“If I knew you would be so stubborn, I might have waited longer.”

“Alai wa, Phi…”

“You were in so much pain that you went soft.” Great said. “I’m not going to put you through that.”

His heart sank. “Does that mean you don’t want to…”

“No.” 

“Oh.”

Gulf looked away dejectedly. Was this another rejection again? 

“I meant I didn’t want to stop.”

He looked back at Great again, who smiled softly at him.

“Instead of me pushing myself into you, I’ll let you work yourself onto me.”

“Oh.” 

_Oh._

“Yes,” Great whispered. “I want to watch you sit on my cock, N’Gulf.”

Gulf never in his life would have imagined someone asking him to sit on their cock, let alone watch him do it and it sounded so incredibly erotic, his recently deflated cock was twitching again. 

That was also when he felt fingers there again. “Phi?” 

“Stretching you more.”

This time Great stuffed all three fingers inside him at once and he let out a loud moan. 

“Feels good, Phi.” he breathed.

“Tell me when you’re ready, Tii Rak.” 

_Tii Rak?_

Gulf gave the man a questioning look.

“I couldn’t help it. Wanted to call you that for a while now. Seeing your beautiful face while my fingers were inside you made me lose composure for a second.” Great said with a twinkle in his eyes.

“Aow.” 

“Should I stop call-“

“I like it. I like that you are call-“

Gulf saw stars. 

The fingers found his spot again and they were pressing hard on it. “Phi!” he let out a cry and clung onto Great’s shoulders, digging his nails into his skin. 

“Tell me when you’re ready… Tii Rak.” Great whispered into his ear and gave the tip a lick.

Gulf shivered violently. “I’m ready, Phi!” He fought to contain another cry. “I’m ready!”

“Okay then.”

And the fingers were gone from inside him. 

With help from Great holding his own cock, Gulf adjusted himself until he felt the tip at his entrance again and slowly pushed himself down. He wasn’t sure if it was because of the second round of fingering, or because he had full control over how much he wanted to take in at a time, but there was little to no pain even though the pressure was still immense. His entrance was stretched taut but his walls gave in easier and after pausing a few times while receiving butterfly kisses from Great, he finally fully seated himself on the hard, pulsing cock.

And he felt full. 

Very, very full.

“Nong...” Great grunted. “You are so tight... and hot.” The man was gripping his hips so tightly, Gulf was sure he was going to leave bruises.

“Phi…” Gulf whimpered. “I feel so full.” He was afraid to move because the tip of Great’s cock was brushing lightly against the spot that drove him mad with pleasure and he didn’t want to lose control just yet. 

“Tii Rak,” Great whispered. “What do you want to do? Fuck yourself over me or... let me fuck you?”

His cock twitched again.

“Phi, I want you to- Ah!!” he cried out.

Great had snapped his hips up. “What did you say you want, Tii Rak?”

“I want you to fu-“

In an instant, Gulf was flipped onto his back and he let out a loud yelp as all the wind was knocked out of his chest. 

Great hooked his legs over his shoulders and leaned forward. “Sorry, Tii Rak. I didn’t hear you.” he whispered. “What do you want?”

So deep.

The cock inside him was deeper than before and Gulf wanted it to move _right now_. “I want you to fuck me!” he cried out.

Great took one of his hands, interlinking their fingers together and pinned them above his head. “As you wish, Tii Rak.” he said.

And the thrusting started. 

Gulf whimpered, moaned and cried out each time his tender spot was slammed hard by the cock driving in and out of him. With his body and hand pinned, all he could do was thrash his head about while gripping the sheets of the bed hard and angled his hips to meet each of Great’s thrust, which alternated between short and shallow, and long and hard, but never failed to be precise in its aim. 

“Tii Rak, you feel so good.”

Through his blurry vision, Gulf could make out sweat trickling down Great’s face and body, and in the few moments of clarity he had, Gulf could also make out contractions of his abs whenever he pulled out and rammed his cock back inside him. And the scene was so erotic, so _sensual_ that it made the tension beneath his cock almost unbearable. 

Intoxicatingly unbearable.

“Phi..” Gulf moaned. “Me too. Please don’t stop. Please-“

“I won’t, Tii Rak.” Great whispered. “I said I will make you feel good, and I intend to keep my word.”

“Then make me scream too, Phi.” he begged. “Fuck me harder.”

Great let go of his hand and leaned in closer, nearly folding his body in half. And Gulf wrapped his arms around his shoulders, shutting his eyes in anticipation for what was to come.

But nothing came and Great didn’t move.

“Phi?” Gulf opened his eyes.

Great was staring at him again. “Tii Rak.” He leaned to give him a deep kiss. “Are you sure? You will be sore tomorrow, this is your first time after all.”

Gulf could tell from the ragged breathing and flushed cheeks, Great was closed to coming and yet, he still stopped to ask if he was okay.

What did he ever do to deserve such a man? 

“P’Great, I won’t break, so-” He pressed a kiss onto Great’s lips. “Don’t hold back.”

It seemed that was all he needed to say before Great started pounding into him with desperate abandon, and sending his head so far off, Gulf only knew how to do one thing. 

And that was to scream.

Every time their hips met with a resounding clap that resonated in their quiet hotel room, it would be followed by his high-pitched cries of ‘Phi’ and ‘Ah’. As Great neared his peak, so did the pace of his thrust and Gulf was near having the life fucked out of him as his body was folded further and pinned deeper into the bed. 

“Tii Rak, I’m closed.” Great grunted. “I want you to come first.”

“Ho- How- Phi? Ah!”

“Like this.” Great grabbed his own cock and started jerking him off. 

It was all too much. The combination of having a cock pistoning in and out of him while slamming into that tender spot repeatedly, and having his own cock being stroked with equal pacing. It didn’t take long for him to reach his peak.

“P’Great!” he screamed as his whole body tightened up and the pressure below his abdomen gave way.

Gulf came hard.

“Shia! N’Gulf!” Great groaned loudly. “You are squeezing me so tightly…”

While Gulf rode out the waves of his own release, Great maintained his pace, working till one final snap of his hips, and with a loud groan, he came inside him. Hot spurts of liquid squirted against his walls and Gulf could feel it slowly filling him up.

“Phi…” he let out. “You’re coming inside me…”

Great had collapsed on top of him. “Yes, are you okay?”

“Feels good.” he breathed. “Feels good to have you come inside me.”

Great laughed. “Tii Rak, don’t say anymore. If not we might have to go for a second round.”

“I don’t mind.” In fact, if possible Gulf wanted to do it all the time, and maybe even return the favour to Great as well. He was sure the man wouldn’t mind. 

Propping himself on his elbows, Great gave him a kiss before saying, “You won’t be able to walk tomorrow.”

“Aow. Then you can carry me again like before.”

“What a greedy and demanding nong,” Great said. “You are behaving more like Jiro everyday.”

“Aow! Jiro is na rak!.”

“Yes and so are you. Anyway, we both need rest, it’s been a long day. Let’s clean up before we head to bed.” Great said, already getting up and pulling his soft cock out of him.

Gulf pouted. “Okay then.” He didn’t like the empty feeling left behind after being so fully filled earlier.

Great snorted and dragged him off the bed to wash up. 

When they eventually made it back to bed, Great bundled him up in his arms and they both slowly fell asleep to each other’s steady breathing.

And him listening to Great’s soft heartbeat.

* * *

“What are you doing up so early?” Great circled his arms around him.

“Couldn’t sleep.”

Gulf had woken up before dawn and couldn’t fall asleep after. The phantom feeling of liquid sloshing inside him, coupled with the not-so-dull ache led him to get up from the bed, which had to be done very carefully because his back hurt. 

He had made his way to the balcony and stayed outside since, watching as the dark sky slowly became brighter and listening to distant sounds of crashing waves. Koh Samet was beautiful in the morning.

“How are you feeling?” Great asked.

“Sore,” he said. “And my back hurts.”

“Sorry.” 

“I kinda asked for it, Phi.”

“I know,” Great said. “But I’m still sorry.”

“It’s okay. I… really liked it.”

Great kissed the tip of his ear. “Thank you. I liked it too. A lot actually.”

“Maybe we could switch next time.”

Great laughed. “Sure, of course. Anything for my Tii Rak.”

_Tii Rak._

He loved hearing that name, much more than he ever did with ‘Tua Aeng’.

“Say it again, Phi.”

“Tii Rak.”

“Thank you.”

Great hugged him tighter. “I’m so happy I found you yesterday.”

“Me too, P’Great.” he said. “Thank you for giving me new memories of this place.”

“We can come more often if you want.”

His heart swelled. “I’d like that…”

“We can make new memories together so you can forget the ones that hurt.”

Gulf turned around and reached out to take Great’s face in his hands. “Phi. Thank you. I would really like that.” he smiled.

Great placed a kiss on the inside of his wrist. “You’re welcome, Tii Rak.”

“Say it again.”

“Tii-”

“No. The other one.”

Great raised one of his eyebrows. “Which-”

“The one you said when we were heading to the clinic.”

“Oh.”

“Please?”

Great let out a soft sigh. “Of course. You don’t have to say please. I’ll say it everyday if you want.”

“Say it now then.”

“I’m-”

“I'm utterly and completely smitten with you,” Gulf smiled.

Great stared at him in surprise. 

Gulf leaned to place a kiss on his lips. “I meant it when I said it was hard not to fall in love with you.

“Nong…” Great blinked at him, his eyes slowly glistening over.

“Rak Na, P’Great. Thank you for always being for me.” Gulf smiled.

“Nong- N’Gulf!” Great pulled him into a crushing embrace. 

“There, I said it first. Now it’s your turn.” 

Gulf heard a deep breath and sniffle.

“Rak Na, N’Gulf. Always.”

The end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The is truly the end. I never planned to write so much for this but I am happy with the way it turned out. I also never intended to write smut as well, but the idea came and didn't leave so smut it was. Hope you enjoyed it.
> 
> Thank you for reading and I'll be putting out more work in the future, especially with KaoGulf etc.


	4. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A bonus for everyone and because Jiro deserves some skewers.

Mayhem.

Absolute mayhem.

When Great asked him to pick Jiro up from the daycare centre, he did not expect to walk into a scene of a circus. There were dogs of different sizes and breeds all running about and barking while a few staff watched over them.

“How can I help you, N’Gulf?” 

It was Peach, the main caretaker at the centre.

“Is it always this crazy!?”

Peach laughed. “Oh no! We are just full-house today that’s why. Normally it’s a lot quieter.”

_Thank god._

Gulf couldn’t imagine having to stay for extended hours inside this place if it was so chaotic and Jiro didn’t seem like the kind that would want to. No wonder the puppy was always trying to escape. If it were him, he would too.

“N’Gulf?” Peach asked. “Are you here to pick Jiro up?”

“Ah, yes.” he said. “Where is he?”

Peach looked around the chaos around them before a frown slowly appeared on her. “This is strange, I don’t see him.”

“Aow!” 

It was strange indeed. Gulf would have thought Jiro would be all over him by now since the dog never failed to be excited when seeing him.

“Shia!” Peach suddenly cursed out. “What if he ran out again!?”

Gulf cursed under his breath as well. “I’ll go take a look outside.”

Making his way out of the daycare centre, he was immediately relieved to walk onto the quiet side street and leaving the chaos contained behind the closed door of the daycare centre. His ears were near deaf already. Gulf peered up and down the sidewalk and across the street for any signs of a golden Japanese spitz but came up empty. 

And just as he was about to call out Jiro’s name, he noticed a familiar bushy tail peeking out from the side of the food cart. 

Gulf let out a snort. “Jiro!” he called out.

The bushy tail disappeared and a shy looking Shiba Inu peeked out instead.

“What are you doing there, Jiro?” 

Jiro let out a soft bark and ran over to him, wagging his tail excitedly.

Gulf took a few steps forward to meet the dog and dug into his pockets for the leash before hooking it onto Jiro’s collar. "Hello, Jiro!" he greeted.

“You found him!” Peach called out from inside the centre.

Gulf turned around smiling. “Yeah, he was hiding behind the food cart.”

“Aow! Why am I not surprised?” Peach laughed. “Oh! Remember not to feed him! He just had lunch!”

“I won’t!” he called out.

Peach gave him another wide grin before waving off and heading back into the centre.

Gulf returned the gesture before squatting down to pet Jiro. “We are going to meet P’Great for lunch now so no skewers okay?” 

Jiro tilted his head at him. 

Gulf smiled and ruffled the dog’s head before standing up and walking off, but after a few steps he couldn't go any further. The leash was stuck.

“Jiro?” he pulled at the leash again.

Jiro laid on the sidewalk and whined softly, looking up at him very sad looking puppy eyes. 

“Jiro…” he said with a warning tone.

Jiro’s gaze shifted to the food cart and then back at him. 

Gulf let out a loud sigh. He wasn’t going to win in this and Jiro knew it since he gave in each and every single time. 

“Alright, just one. Okay?” he said, walking up to the food cart to grab the skewers. “On a second thought, maybe I’ll get one too.” 

The owner of the food cart snorted at him before handing the two skewers over. “Enjoy. Don’t need to pay, it’s on me today.” he said.

“Aow, thanks khun phi,” Gulf grinned happily before moving away and squatting down to feed the skewers to Jiro while he gnawed at his own. “Alright, Jiro. We have to keep this a secret okay?”

After slurping up the skewers from his palm with one big swipe of his tongue, Jiro let out a soft bark in appreciation and started licking at face.

“Stop, Jiro!” he giggled. “You are going to get sauce on my face! We need to erase all evidence so P’Great doesn’t find out.”

“Find out what?”

Gulf jumped, nearly falling over on the sidewalk if it wasn’t for the arm behind his back holding him steady. “P-Phi!” he exclaimed. “When did you get here?!”

“Just,” Great said, looking between Jiro and him. “You have sauce on your lips, Tii Rak.” He reached out to wipe the side of his lips with his thumb before bringing it to his mouth to suck gently. All the while looking intently at him.

Was the man trying to seduce him while they were squatting on the sidewalk?

“Aow, Phi,” he said. “Erm. Thanks.” 

“I told you not to feed Jiro,” Great gave him a disapproving look.

“It was just one, Phi…” Gulf pouted. “Besides, I’m having one too!” He held up his half-finished skewer.

Great grabbed the skewer from his hand and finished the remaining meat in one big bite.

“Alai na, Phi!” he exclaimed. “Why did you steal my skewer!”

“Why didn’t you buy any for me?” Great retorted.

“Aow!” he let out. “I thought you said we were going to have lunch and we shouldn’t eat beforehand!”

“But you bought one for yourself and Jiro.”

“Aow-”

_Oh._

Great was jealous, _again_. Jealous of his own dog.

Gulf wanted to laugh but held it back instead. “Well, you already ate mine,” he said. “What more do you want me to do?”

Great pointed at his own cheek. 

Gulf snorted. “Fine.” He leaned in and gave the petty man a peck on his cheek. 

Smiling satisfyingly, Great stood up and pulled him up as well. “Shall we go, Tii Rak?”

Wrapping his arm around Great’s and linking their fingers together, he pulled Jiro along, “Come on Jiro.” Then, he smiled widely at his faen.

“Let’s go, P’Great.”

And the three of them walked off together. 


End file.
